Lord, Bless the Children--Part 1 by Sharon Espeseth

Jesus with young children
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Jesus Loves the Little Children

"The people brought children to Jesus, hoping he might touch them. The disciples shooed them off. But Jesus was irate and let them know it: 'Don't push these children away. Don't ever get between them and me. These children are at the very centre of life in the kingdom. Mark this: Unless you accept God's kingdom in the simplicity of a child, you'll never get in. Then gathering the children up in his arms, he laid his hands of blessing on them. (Mark 10:13-16 The Message).” 

 

Teaching 

For my first year of teaching, I was assigned to teach 24 grade three students in a small three-room school in a small town. I “adopted” these kids and vowed to do the best I could for each of them. Each year, I “adopted” a new batch of kids and committed myself to teaching them to the best of my ability. Knowing I needed more education to meet the varied needs of my students, I continued taking evening and summer classes at the U of A. 

Being single, I had the opportunity to live and teach in different communities in Alberta where I gained experience. My niche became the primary classroom, and maybe reading recovery programs. 

In 1974, I moved from Fort McMurray back to Edmonton, where I could take more courses at U of A. I also taught Resource Room students half-time in Alex Taylor. Teaching in this inner city school with Steve Ramsankar, a nationally recognized educator, as my principal was an amazing adventure. I loved teaching kids to read and to unlock the treasures in written material.

Sharon in the Classroom

Changes in the Status Quo

My return to Edmonton was for only one year, because 1974 was also the year I met Hank. We were married the next summer and Barrhead became my more permanent home. Hank knew I enjoyed teaching and working or spending time with kids. He listened when I told him I longed to have  children of my own. “If for any reason we don’t have children," I added, “I’d like to adopt.” He didn’t walk away.

After 18 months of marriage, we still didn’t have children. Married at 31 years, I may have been impatient. I reminded my  husband about our "pre-nuptial discussion.” When I came home from school the next day, adoption papers were on the table. We filed our application with Social Services in mid-January, 1977.

Adoption

In May of that year, I got a letter from the Department of Social Services saying I'd need to resign from teaching, effective June 30, in order to qualify for adopting an infant. We were surprised. Somebody, and we believe it was God, knew something we didn’t know. 

Realizing I’d be leaving the classroom indefinitely, I got to work with report cards, packing my own teacher files and material, and getting everything in order. On the morning of June 29th, a teacher work day without students, Hank came to school to help me take my “teaching stuff" home. 

When Hank arrived, he told me he had news to tell me, but first he asked for a private place where we coul sit down. I couldn’t read his facial expression. Was he excited? Worried? Sick? We stopped in a small workroom off the hallway. That’s where he told me we were going to be receiving a baby. Not soon, but tomorrow. 

We needed to travel several hours to pick up our first baby, almost newborn, the following morning. Our social worker had previously advised us not to buy baby things ahead of time as we wouldn’t know the size or the gender of the baby until we got the call. After a quick shopping scramble and a friend’s promise of a shower within a few days, we were on the road travelling south.

Arrival after Arrival after Arrival

Next day, we were bringing our first child, Michael, home less than six months after submitting our adoption application  His arrival caused quite a stir for us and among our family and friends. In fact, when we got home to Barrhead, the Espeseth’s had started arriving for a July 1 family reunion. Guess who was the star of that show? 

One year later, Christie, also just weeks old, joined our family without the family reunion, but with equal fanfare. She was introduced to the Augustson family at a picnic in Red Deer. Jennifer was almost six months when we were called away to receive her--our third child--into the family. The enthusiasm of Jenny’s older siblings only increased the hubbub of her arrival at Betty and Leon’s, where they waited for their new sister.

Within two years and two months from our first application, Hank and I had become the parents of three young children. God had listened to my longtime prayer, which was now our prayer, to have children of our own. 

Backyard picnic with 3 muskateers

Hank and I were ecstatic. Then came the first day Hank went back to work and I realized exactly how busy I would be. Within a week, we were moving to our new house, which would be more suitable for all of us. 

As imperfect and ordinary as we were, we had been chosen to be the parents of Michael, Christie and Jennifer. They kept us busy, but they were so much fun. Adding our three children to the family, my dad had a constant supply of new stories about his grandchildren.

Grandpa lots of stories about the grandkids

Just as God had knit each of these babies together in their respective mothers’ wombs, we believed He would give us the wisdom and grace to parent our three children. He knit the five of us together into a family.

Knit together as a family
Children are Christie, Jenny and Michael

Our Gratitude Together with Our Concerns for the Birth Mothers

Decades later, we are still grateful to these three young women, really teen at that time. Each of them had tough decisions to make when facing an unplanned and, what must have seemed an untimely, pregnancy. Each mother in her own words wrote that she wasn’t ready for the responsibility of parenting then, due to school and other concerns. For her child, each birth mother wanted a loving family with two parents who were more ready for parenting.

Hank and I and the extended family are especially thankful these three birth mothers didn’t choose abortion as a solution to an “inconvenient” pregnancy. Yes, for our sakes, we are grateful that we have the three children who were entrusted to our care. But we also realize that, but for the grace of God and the three women, our children might not have been given the gift of life. Hank and I are also thankful for the mothers themselves that they didn’t suffer the aftermath of abortion.

One of My Passions Is the Life and Well-being of Children

As Christian, most of us agree that every stage of life--from the womb to the tomb--is important. Pro-life is a personal and spiritual view for me, rather than a political one. Many times I’ve asked myself the Micah question. “. . . What does the Lord require of me? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with (my) God (Micah 6:8 NIV). 

I believe pro-life means all of the above. Saving unborn children is important, but acting justly in all our endeavours, being loving and merciful, and walking humbly with God also counts. 

Whose Children Are They?

“The children we have are never really ours. They are given to us, in trust, for a time, a short time really, and we are asked to be mothers and fathers, mentors guardians, teachers, priests, ministers and friends to them, but they are never really our children. They belong to somebody else, God, and to themselves more than they ever belong to us.”

                            Quote from Fr. Ron Rolheiser’s column “In Exile” in The Catholic Register, 2006

To be continued. . .