Mail at Death’s Door by Michelle Joy Teigrob

 

To Me on My Final Day,

Well, I guess this is it. You’re about to become the shadow, the mist, the flower, that vanishes from earth forever. Of course, we both know this also means you’re stepping into something more glorious than you could ever imagine. (More on that in another letter).

For this missive, I want to talk about your time on earth.

Oh, how I yearn to know that you are finishing well. How my heart strains with the hope that that, as you heave your final breath, your spirit rests fully at peace.

Finish well, my dear, older self. Whether that final day occurs one day from now, one month, or one year, cross the finish line with your spiritual chin up, shoulders back, arms pumping.

I know middle age shook you harder than you expected. For a time, you allowed discouragement and even some despair to rattle your spirit into nearly giving up in bitterness. As heartache and trouble slammed into your middle years, you wondered why God had ever let you live.

Why did you and your twin survive a very difficult birth, when the doctor believed both of you could likely not make it? Why, at 21 years of age, could you walk away with only minor injuries from the same car crash that took your twin to heaven much too early? So very often your spirit cried out these questions.

I suspect, even on your last day on earth, you don’t hold the complete answer to these wonderings. They are the sorts of anguished musings that I truly believe can only be fully and satisfactorily responded to in heaven.

But, I hope, oh, I pray so hard, that between the time that I pen this letter and the day you step into eternity, you found a way to exist with the tension of not knowing those answers while also living every day as faithfully and fully as God gave you strength.

I pray you discovered and held onto whatever it was you needed to remain faithful – faithful to God, faithful to your family, and faithful to your life’s purpose, including the call you sensed on your heart to write.

I know that in mid-life you drank fresh courage and inspiration from learning about the lives of writers who embarked on their writing ministries in the latter half of their existence. The story of Hildegard of Bingen especially nourished your motivation. Born in 1098, Hildegard started writing for publication in middle age. Despite physical sickness and an acute sense of her own inadequacies, she went on to pen visionary books, two volumes on natural medicine, 77 pieces of music, and more than 400 letter corresponding with popes, emperors, and other leading figures of her day. (The fact that she was the youngest of ten children, like you, sparked a special sense of connection with her, despite the centuries between you).

“Never, never, never give up.” Long before the days of social media posts, our twin Maria had discovered this line famously spoken by Winston Churchill during the black days of World War II. I remember seeing it scribbled in one of her notebooks. Decades later, our son Micah, drawn to the same powerful line, copied it out on a card and taped it to his wall. You always loved to collect snippets of sayings that ignited your spirit – and quotes loved by people you loved gave you extra fire.

I pray that to your final day, you never stopped drawing courage, hope, and strength from stories and sayings.

More than anything, I pray so earnestly that you never ever gave up the practice you started as a young woman of calling out to the Giver of Life, of always seeking to know him more, and of depending on him fully and completely for your every need.

Dear, older self on your last day on earth, as the windows of heaven begin to part, my whole being yearns to know that you are hearing these words: “Well done, good and faithful servant” (Matthew 25:23, ESV).

Please, for my sake, for the sake of all who ever loved you -- those who have gone before, those still alive, and the generations of the future -- but, most of all, for the sake of Jesus, your Saviour and Lord – finish well.

Michelle Joy Teigrob lives with her family in Peterborough, Ontario. Her book on grief, Joyfully Star-mapping Through Life's Dung Piles, is now available at michellejoybooks.ca.

 

 

Dear Younger Self by Peggianne Wright

December 31, 1976

Dear Diary,
My best friend and I have had a colossal fight and I don't think we'll ever be friends again.

What felt like the end of the world that turbulent night was filled with God's blessings in so many ways. But only as I matured both as a person and a Christian would I recognize and understand it. From that agonizing phase of my young teenage life, I can now say:

 

Dear Younger Self,

You're still learning. The world is a hard place for soft hearts like yours. But, keep it soft no matter what.

Hold on to your values but be flexible. You were taught by loving parents who set you on a path with Jesus at your side. No matter what the world accepts, your principles and moral values must remain your guardrails. Pray for those in your life who are faltering. Extend your hand to those who are lost.

Dark Seasons will always end; you've been through them time and time again. Even though the painful times will sting and you'll feel hopeless and alone, remember that the One you can turn to is always right there with you.

Cling to Jesus and cry when it feels comforting. Tears have a way of washing away the hard times and purging our hearts of the soreness and ache. Losses will occur; more and more the older you get. But, in those losses grow sweet memories that are best cherished and nurtured with our loving God close by.

Not everyone will love you; accept it and extend grace both to yourself and others. You are genuine and compassionate but that isn't always a ticket to happiness. Often, your faulty expectations of others will lead to disappointment. But the One who loves you most is the only One you need worry about.

Close friends will abandon you; remain loyal. A thought expressed wrongly, an oversight, a lapse of judgement, or any kind of faux pas may challenge a loving friendship. Even at the times when you wrack your brain to find answers and cannot understand what happened, remember that God's plan is at work. Don't lose faith in a lost friendship but hold it dear in your heart, even if that's the only place left for it. Do your utmost to love your neighbour, even if they've turned their back on you.

Above all, remember to pray first, pray last, and pray in between. Jesus wants you close to Him and in constant contact. Whether life is rich with happiness or stormy with turbulent times, remember you are abundantly blessed as a member of God's Kingdom and beloved no matter what.

In Him who loved us first,
Your Older Self

Peggianne Wright is a published author and is the founder of the pet parent ministry Paws To Pray, blending her passion for the Lord and all-things-K9 to form this unique, faith-based community. Peggianne is an ardent Bible study student, devoted dog mom, wife of 44 years, and lover of music. Her blogs Spiritual Scribbles and Fur-Kid Fanatics can be found on her website www.PawsToPray.ca 

You can follow her on Facebook

www.Facebook.com/PawsToPray/ and on Instagram www.instagram.com/sister_in_prayer/

A Letter to My Way Younger Self by Bob Jones

The February prompt is to write a letter to your younger self. What advice would you give?


Dear Bob:

Congratulations on landing your first assignment in pastoral ministry. You've been given a sacred opportunity. Your new role as an assistant pastor will demand more of you than anything else in life. This role is way more than a job; it is a calling.

You will put in long hours, sometimes seven days a week. At the beginning you won't know what you're doing but that's OK. You'll feel that way for every new major challenge that God calls you into. Bible College trained you to parse Bible verses but not to deal with the complexity of human interaction. You will run programs not people.

No matter what happens, people are never the problem. The problem isn’t even the problem. How you look at the problem is the problem.

Don't sweat the small stuff. It's all small stuff.

The most important person in your life is your wife, Jocelyn. She will be with you day in day out for decades. In due time you'll leave your first congregation and enter into a new ministry opportunity and Jocelyn will be there with you for that. She is the only person you'll carry forward, aside from your firstborn son.

Pay attention to Jocelyn. She is God's best gift to you. She is smart. She is good.

She wants you to succeed and she will do everything she can to help you achieve that.

Listen to her. She has insight about people that you don't have. Trust her judgment. She is intuitive.

She loves you. Put her first. Make time for her. Quantity and quality time. Do your best to understand her. Live at peace with her.

Have fun with her.

Together, you will walk through the deaths of your parents, and life-threatening illnesses, and travel to dangerous places. Hold hands all the way and hold each other tight.

You will be privileged to journey with stellar leaders through plans and projects to the glory of God. Your labour will endure. You will see a harvest of souls from the seeds you will sow.

You will walk many congregants and community members through death, devastating trauma, and grief. Those experiences will be God’s training to prepare you for your own personal losses.

Your lifetime will pass by seemingly at the speed of light. Just as the scriptures advise us, “our days are but a handbreadth.” Live in the moment. Treasure every day. Start with Bible reading, prayer, journaling, and coffee. Always coffee.

Your collection of the front pages of newspapers from Canada and around the world will end up in the garbage. The books you purchased for your study will be given away to younger leaders and a Bible college library. The Coca-Cola bottle and can collection that will eventually define your office space will end up on other people’s shelves. But the relationships you develop, the leaders you call up and invest in, and the people that you share Jesus with will last eternally.

Settle your priorities early.

You can't put God in the centre of your church or your marriage or your role. But you can put God in the centre of your life and that choice will affect everything else.

All work and no play will make Bob a dull boy.

So, listen to Jocelyn, take time off, relax, and make use of all your holidays every year. The church will survive without you. Put your hand into a bucket of water and then draw it out and the hole that remains defines how indispensable you are.

God is for you. No matter how dire the circumstances, or how much you doubt yourself, God is for you. Walk in that truth. It will sustain you, give you grit, and keep your heart and mind quiet and at rest as you trust Jesus.

God bless you, Bob.

Your friend,
Bob

 

I had a lot of fun writing this. That's what writing should be all about. Thank you for the prompt.

I'm grateful for the life and wife and family and friends and opportunities God has given me.

How about you?

Written to Myself, by Lorrie Orr

 

This month's prompt is to write a letter to yourself. It can be difficult to know where to start. Here are a few suggestions whether you write to your younger or older self, or to yourself in the present.

1. Reflect on where you are in life and how you got there.

2. Express gratitude. Acknowledge both joys and sorrows.

3. Consider lessons learned and how they move you forward.

4. What are your dreams? How can they come to fruition?

5. Be gentle with yourself.

 

Hello there,

This morning, clouds are banked along the horizon, moving in fast from the west. There’s a bit of blue sky visible, but rain is in the forecast. Tonight, the full moon will shine over you, and stars will glimmer whether you can see them or not. How many more beautiful moons will sail over you? Only God knows, for your times are in his hand.

You’ve had an amazing life, and there’s more amazing ahead! You might be in the autumn of life number-wise, but spring’s tendrils of personal growth are not dependent on the physical world. They can grow anytime and anywhere they are given a little light and openness. Nurture them. Bask in the beauty of life.

Throughout life, you’ve waited for other people to validate you and that has held you back. With God’s guidance you can make decisions about your future and move ahead, trusting God to walk with you. Lean into the gentle rhythms of grace he offers.

You’re never too old to begin something new, and although it’s a steep curve, entering the book publishing world is something exciting. You’ve written all your life; letters, poems, stories, blog posts, and now it’s time to get that body of work out where people can read it and be encouraged by how God has worked in your life.

The future is unknown. There will be hard times ahead just as there were hard times in the past. God’s grace will hold and strengthen you no matter what. Be confident and step forward with a smile on your face.

And always remember, you are dearly loved.

Lorrie Orr writes to herself from her kitchen table by a window

overlooking her garden in Victoria, BC.