M is for Memoir ~ by Wendy L. Macdonald

 

Writing a memoir is both easy and difficult. 

My favorite genre to read is memoir. Like a novel, it’s a story. Unlike formula fiction, it’s rarely predictable. The journey is usually full of surprises. Things often happen that are too strange for any other genre. Those readers would say, “Yeah, right,” and toss the book across the room. 

With memoir, the crazier the plot, the more engaged fans become.

For older authors—like me—it’s often easier to write memoir than fiction because we don’t have to remember details about what our characters did several chapters ago. It’s all recorded in our memory. (Unless the writer isn’t telling the truth.) Truth is critical in a memoir. And besides, if you tell the truth, you never need to remember what you said. It’s scandalous when a memoirist lies. (It’s okay to have a disclaimer at the beginning of the book letting readers know you changed some details to protect the identity of others.)

While writing my recovery memoir, I discovered an intriguing pattern I hadn’t noticed before getting those years down on paper. Putting our stories in a Word Doc grants us a bird’s eye view we may otherwise have missed.

God’s loving control becomes more evident when we comb our experiences for nuggets of wisdom and hope. 

Now for the difficult part of writing a memoir:

Since I’m a nobody in the eyes of the publishing world, I need to self-publish my memoir if I want it to be read by people other than my critique partners. Even that was challenging. Seeing their empathy regarding some hurtful events awakened grief in me. Any denial that I had regarding past pain was obliterated by their compassion. I left the group because I feared the intensity of my own feelings. I felt like a betrayer of my family’s secrets. Obviously, it wasn’t time for this story to be revealed yet. 

Sometimes we need to wait until the challenging people from our past are safely tucked away.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean denial. But it does mean we shouldn’t cause harm to those who hurt us. And unless we’re nudged by God to press charges, we need to let go and trust He who numbered our tears. 

And we need to pray for people who were enemies in our past. We’ve been forgiven of much. And we’re also called to forgive much. 

Since setting the editing of my recovery memoir aside, God healed much more of my heart. Compassion for my abusers has replaced the fear that used to well up whenever I thought of them.

Time plus God’s grace heals old wounds. 

When I read a memoir written by someone who is obviously not bitter or fearful about their past, it’s a pleasure. Readers must not be overwhelmed by a memoir. The book should inspire them to consider the amazing way God’s grace can rescue and heal us when we’re down. Although some memoirs document a hard life, a spiritual memoir that inspires us to press into the softness of God’s hands is always a good read.

This is how believers can be honest about their difficult past and bless readers in the present.  

What recent memoir have you found inspiring?

Do everything in love. 1 Corinthians 16:14 (NIV)

Wendy L. Macdonald is an inspirational blogger and podcaster who loves to photograph nature on Vancouver Island. Her byline is: “My faith is not shallow because I’ve been rescued from the deep.”