“For you created my inmost being; you knit
me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I
am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well” (Psalm 139: 13, 14).
A small step in my
writing life was not the often-termed “one step at a time.” My small step was more of a “toe step at a
time.” I had to learn when I was young
to make my way in the world by going to school.
As an introvert I would rather keep my distance from the world. During my years at school, both elementary
and high school, my world was loud and crowded. A lot of my peers were loud, aggressive and emotionally
draining. Crowds were not and are not my
scene.
In a twist of
irony my first “toe step” of my writing was when in my first year of high
school I had to present an oral report to my class. First I had to write the report then, to my
horror, I had to read it in front of my class of peers. I remember trying to convince my teacher that
this was something I didn’t want to do.
He didn’t agree. I had to do it,
shaky knees and all! I’m not kidding
about the shaky knees!
While I was
presenting my report I was standing by the teacher’s desk and I kept hearing a
tap-tap-tap noise. My teacher politely
said, “Alan, perhaps you could step back a bit from the desk.” To my amazement the tapping stopped right
away. “Oh boy,” I thought to myself, “I
was the one doing the tapping!” I don’t
remember what the report was about. All
I remember is the tapping.
There have been
many toe steps since that nerve-wracking experience. Over the years my toe steps have indeed
included a number of full steps. These
full steps all surround the growth in my love for writing. Certainly, I guess due to my cautious nature,
most of my steps have been small.
When I put these
small steps together I see a lot of ground has been covered. This includes fifteen years of pastoral
ministry and a whole bunch of sermons written.
With writing then preaching the sermons I was taught by God’s people
about encouragement and rejection.
Rejection is not failure. It is
an aid to growth for us as writers.
It has taken me
literally decades to accept that God “knit me together” to be a writer. Even while in my mother’s womb, I was being
formed by God for a purpose. It has been
approximately forty-eight years since I heard the “tapping” from my class
report. The tapping has turned to
praising. Praising the One who gave me the gift of writing one "toe step at a
time!"
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ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing, Alan. I love how God leads us, often one tiny toe step at a time, taking into account our gifts and abilities, as well as our personalities
ReplyDeleteThank you for the comments Ruth. I appreciate you took the time. I've never been the most aggressive or outgoing kind of person. I guess toe by toe is the give away that I am cautious. I do move forward sooner or later. Each post I send is yet another toe step in my journey through life.
DeleteHow wonderful that this high school teacher insisted you read your story. He saw something in what you had written and knew that you needed someone to pressure you into reading. He was also intuitive in suggesting that move away from the desk instead of telling you not to tap on the desk.
ReplyDeleteHi Sharon! Yes, at the time I didn't see my teacher's prodding as anything positive. He was a good guy and a caring teacher. Perhaps that is why I remember him and not my report. He and the tapping are imbedded in my mind. I am thankful for your encouragement Sharon. Thank you!
DeleteI admire people who are able to overcome enormous fears in order to fulfill the calling God has placed on them. Our associate pastor dry heaves every Sunday he has to speak, but God uses him mightily to communicate gospel truths and we so appreciate his ministry.
ReplyDeleteHi Susan! I feel the pastor's heaves! I think our gifting can be stronger than our fears when it is called for. He may experience that each time he comes to the pulpit.
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