“There’ll be times when you wonder how you
can possibly thank (God) for something that turns your life upside-down…Let us,
then, at times like these, give thanks on
faith alone…obedient, trusting, hoping, believing.” So wrote the author Jan
Karon.[i]
Prompt:
Share
an experience in your writing life when you found that to give thanks was
especially difficult—but yet you did give thanks. How did you find your way to
victory? What did God teach you through this experience?
Transforming
Adverse Situations
A number of years ago
while taking a course on memoir writing, I tried
writing an article about my elementary school years. At first all I could
remember was being bullied and ostracized. I was even misunderstood by my
teacher.
Writing that article took a lot of time and I wasn’t getting anywhere. I
felt as though all my writing energy was being sucked into a black hole—a soul
hole. The article had no neat and tidy resolution of someone coming to my
rescue or helping me through it. Even God didn’t seem to comfort me (2 Corinthians
1:3b-4), because at that young age, I hadn’t learned how
to talk to Him in my troubles.
I set the article aside and turned
my attention to other writing.
However, that unresolved story stayed in my mind, needling me like a pebble
in my shoe. I wanted to understand why God had allowed my suffering. Perhaps
like Job, I would never know. I just had to trust that He had a reason. Would
that be enough for me?
I began journaling my questions, reflections and scriptures.
And all the while God
reminded me, “In everything give thanks.”
Now thanking God in everything
has been one of my life principles. God causes all things to work for the good
of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). Thanking God clears the clutter of my mind
and spirit from frustration, anxiety or disappointment. Then in quiet moments
He can freely give me His word and. encouragement
Thanking God opens
the door to a more creative attitude.
And thanking God
turns my eyes from my viewpoint to what God has to say to me.
God reminded me that I had to work through layers of forgiveness—forgiving
those who had hurt me and forgiving myself. As I forgave, God gradually healed
me (and is still healing me) of the injuries from what I had missed out on
friendships and in my education.
Some time later, I attended a women’s retreat. As the speaker shared her
childhood story of abuse, she said, “God wouldn’t have given us those life
experiences unless He wanted to use them for His glory.”
Yes! This was the insight I had been seeking. God wants to touch someone’s
life through those experiences.
But God had a further answer for me. I awoke one night with an overwhelming
sense of God’s presence. He was filling me with gratitude for those childhood traumas
and transforming them into things of beauty.
I may never delve into the details of that story. But the details don’t
matter now. What is more important is
that as I surrender my issues to God and thank Him—even where I have been
mistreated—He will accomplish His purposes both in my life and in ministry to
others.
Challenge:
Now it’s time for your blog. To develop your thoughts, follow this link to a
short sermon on the Apostle Paul’s secrets for giving thanks.
"I may never delve into the details of that story. But..." For we who write, the Lord brings such stories to mind for us to wrestle with, until we seek him for deeper understanding. I like that the Lord has given you permission not to write that story, but to learn and grow from it, even now, decades after the fact. Thank you for sharing from your heart, Sandi. Our God is amazing!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Bobbi. Writing has helped me learn and grow in so many ways.
ReplyDeleteI like what Bobbi said above - that God gave you permission to NOT tell the story. This speaks to me about how carefully we need to listen. Sometimes we need to share our stories of pain and sometimes it is best that we don't. In either case, we have the assurance that God can use our pain for His divine purposes. another thought on this piece is how many people carry scars from wounds inflicted during childhood, sometimes from other kids who probably don;t even remember the harm they caused. Unfortunately, it's not an uncommon theme, yet so very tragic. Not everyone has reached for God's help to get past these experiences and many adults are basically still the same wounded kids inside.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Tracy, for your thoughtful feedback. it's incredibly true how many adults carry the scars of childhood. It takes God's help to get past them.
DeleteThanks for sharing, Sandi. Sometimes we only write for an audience of one - ourselves. Other times God wants us to share with a wider audience. God has been speaking to me about being quiet and listening rather than speaking or writing.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Ruth. I was reminded of Ecclesiastes 3, where the author says there is a time to speak and a time to keep silent. I'm sure that out of your being quiet this time will come life for others.
DeleteSandi, thank you for writing just what I needed to read today! I too, have a story I cannot write other than journalling, therefore my audience is an audience of one (unless the Lord prompts me to release it some day). I enjoyed the link as well. Giving thanks in all things, having a grateful heart, is the key to happiness.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Loretta. Not all stories need a wide audience. God knows what we need to keep to ourselves and what we need to share.
Delete"I felt as though all my energy was being sucked into a black hole...a soul hole." I have been there in that hole many times with my memoir writing...because yes, there isn't always a nice happy ending to point towards; especially if you are still living parts of it. I appreciate your comments on journalling through the pain of it and what God eventually showed you. I can see that I am at this point also and although I continue to plug away at my memoir I have no idea if God has any plans for it beyond myself. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Gloria, for mentioning the difficult things you're writing about. While writing, we don't always know what God has in mind for our words. I just read a quote of Henri Nouwen this morning (in Marcia Laycock's "Abundant Rain") "Writing is a process in which we discover what lives within us. The writing, itself...opens up new spaces within us of which we were not aware before we started to write. To write is to embark on a journey whose final destination we do not know."
Delete"God wants to touch someone's life through those experiences." How wonderfully true--that He used our experiences for His glory. Thanks Gloria for sharing your surrender to God. May He continue to give you healing and strength.
ReplyDeleteOh dear Sandi--I meant thanks to YOU. Where is my mind some days?
DeleteThanks, Connie, for your words of affirmation, both to me and to Gloria.
ReplyDeleteMy heart goes out to you, Sandi. I was fortunate growing up that I did not have this experience, but I saw it happen to others, and I still am heartbroken for the two examples I remember. One was a little Ukrainian girl, who was shy and struggling with her school work in grade one. She appeared mentally challenged to others, but I'm sure it was the language barrier. In a one-room school there were no ESL classes back then and the teacher ignored the younger students. This is where I started my teaching career.
ReplyDeleteThe other student was a boy in my high school class, who obviously came from a troubled or underprivileged home. He slept in his close and wore them for about a month straight, at which point they smelled badly. Then, I suspect the teacher called Social Services and he would come to school clean and in new clothes. Then the process would repeat. He liked to catch up with me in the hallways after Latin class to compare test scores, as we both did well in Latin. I would answer him, but, regretfully, I didn't go out of my way to befriend him.
I learned from these situations and I tried my best to develop an inclusive classroom. How can life be so hard for some? Why do children, and adults, ostracize and bully others? Oh, that God could help us make one another whole.
I hope and pray that somehow these young people found their way in life. I got carried away here, Sandi but this is a topic that I am passionate about. God has obviously given you grace, Sandi, and I pray now that God would complete your healing through your writing or other life circumstances and that you will be able to share your life lessons with others--not that you need to tell your whole story unless that is the way God leads you. It was a pleasure to see you at FC.
Thanks for your reply, Sharon. I've been so encouraged to know how writing this blog has impacted other readers. Thanks too for our conversations at FC. This Wednesday (Oct 7) is the first anniversary of my sister Karen's passing--it brings up a lot of memories.
ReplyDeleteYou are in my prayers at this time of year, Sandi. May you feel God close beside you as he offers his masterful healing.
ReplyDelete