“I have told you these things, so that in me
you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have
overcome the world.”—John 16: 33
In the
World
I feel lonely in the world,
a longing inside,
I do not know what to do about.
My words know,
therefore, I write.
A reminder I am not alone.
--Alan Anderson, Oct. 22, 2021
Throughout the past almost two
years, I made it a point to not write about the Covid pandemic. This post is an
exception. I trust you will sense my inner landscape as I lay bare my
experience of Covid weariness.
Covid Weariness
A young woman loved by my
wife, and I visited us on Terry’s birthday. We chatted for a few minutes, then
our conversation took on a more serious tone as she talked about the Fiend, the
Covid pandemic. Terry and I listened to every groan of her heart. Her words
sounded like one who could no longer hold back the conflict within her.
As life-changing
effects and consequences of this unprecedented time drag on, life will never be
the same. Like the beloved young woman I mentioned, my inner life has not been
left unscarred.
A prompt for this month's post
asks, “How have you faced the tendency to look back and long for how it used to
be?” This reality of reminiscence for life gone by fills my mind with questions.
The questions are like little rats gnawing at my brain. Questions like, when
will the pandemic end? How long will it be until we have “normal” again? Will
the health orders become even more restrictive? I can’t answer these questions
right now, but these little pests need to be dealt with.
I clench my fists when I hear
anything about Covid, yet here I am writing about it. Often these days, my body
aches after being with people who seem fixated on the pandemic. My mind, my
heart, my inner life, scramble to escape this stalking monster.
The attitudes and tone of many
people these days ripped an explosive division through society. Like boiling lava,
these thoughts spew out of people like volcanoes long overdue for eruption.
While the pandemic insists on
acting like a murderous bully, I stay home most of the time. When I venture out,
perhaps once a week I wear a mask. I hate to wear a mask. I am not noble, nor
am I in compliance with the powers that be with regards to the mask order. I
wear a supposed helpful mask because I can’t be bothered explaining to people
if I do not wear one. I am also done with the petty arguments I hear on anything
pertaining to the Fiend. I am plain old tired of it all!
Embrace Peace
Jesus promised us peace. I
need to embrace His peace more. I enjoy a sense of peace when I am at home or
with my church family. Walks on the dike near home act as a security blanket
for me. My peaceful places do not crowd my mind and heart with the insanity
common in the world.
True peace is possible amid the hurricane powered pandemic of illness and people judging others so common today. How about you, dear InScribe family? How are you bearing up these days?
Alan lives in Deroche, B.C. with his wife, Terry. He contributed stories to Good Grief People by Angel Hope Publishing, 2017; Story by Story: The Power of a Writer, Unstoppable Writers Publishing, 2018. Alan has also written articles for FellowScript Magazine. Blog: https://scarredjoy.ca. He has written blog posts for this blog since 2015.
Oh my, Alan, you've expressed well what so many of us are feeling and thinking. Your poem was the perfect introduction to your post.
ReplyDeleteThe potential rifts bother me more than masks and mandates do. I can't control the creation or breaking of laws, but I can learn to listen better to both sides of the line that appears to be drawn between those passionate in what they believe.
I want to continue believing in love--God's love and accept that not everyone is going to think and act the same. But may the church at least live out love. Love will get us through this tough season more than any laws kept or broken can.
Love is the way back to normal. Love.
You're not alone, Alan. None of us are when we're leaning into His love and sharing it through the way we listen to each other and let go of what we can't change while changing what God's invited us to.
Blessings, brother. Thank you for reminding us we're not alone.
Dear Wendy, thank you for your emphasis on love. Love is a desperate need today in our society. I stay close to those who trust in God's love these days. This is a reason I stay close to my beloved InScribers. Blessings and love to you, Wendy.
DeleteI feel the same way. All I want to do these days is binge-watch old TV shows and play with my new kitten, Buz. But I don't believe it's the virus that's the problem but our health bureaucrats. If they'd just let people take whatever precautions they feel necessary, things would be much better. So I'll just muddle through as best as I can.
ReplyDeleteHi Bruce! I join you as you muddle through. At times this is the best I can do these days. Stay safe and well, brother. You are not alone.
DeleteThanks for being so candid, Alan. For me the greatest and most terrible outcome of the pandemic is the division I see among family, friends and groups. It has been so very polarizing. My prayer is that we can begin to bridge this divide and love one another as Christ would have us do, no matter our political or social views. Blessings to you.
ReplyDeleteHi Tracy! I hear you about the division. Division is weep worthy. I experience this in my own relatives. This is a reason I felt a depth of loneliness. I am happy I can come here and be real with you all.
DeleteI echo what the others have commented, Alan. I loved your poem, simple yet profound. The division I see all around me is what disturbs me the most. Even people who identify as Christians or believers sometimes don't get that the Lord wants us to maintain peace, not just within ourselves, but to live in peace with each other to the very best of our ability. That may require at times for us to set aside our opinion, feelings, rights, concerns, obsessions, and whatever it is that is causing division, and instead strive for unity. We must remember that the enemy would like nothing more than to cause families, friends, and neighbours to grow distrust, breed conflict, and experience even hatred. Let's be all united in Christ. It's the only way.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sally! I resonate with your thoughts. The divisions can be so vocal and destructive. I find it disheartening politicians add to the divisions. Oh well, they are only human. You are right, we have but one way to stay united. May it always be so!
DeleteMany of us have written something about this subject over the last year plus, Alan. The divisiveness is what gets me most as well. Give us Your strength to persevere, Lord, and help us to bear the good fruit that comes from living Spirit-filled lives!
ReplyDeleteAmen Susan! We can pray for each other and know we are not alone.
Delete