June 22, 2019

God Speaks Through Special Needs




“Long ago God spoke in many different ways to our fathers through the prophets, in visions, dreams, and even face to face, telling them little by little about his plans.” (Hebrews 1:1, TLB)


The prompt for our June post is a timely one for me. I am going to go as far as to say through this prompt God has spoken to me. A few days ago I was reviewing my blog, Scarred Joy, and decided to refocus it. The only thing is, I wasn’t sure what this refocus would be. I knew whatever direction the blog was to take it would retain my tagline of “touched by grief, held by hope.” The blog would still not shy away from the painful side of life.


Over the past few years my family has undergone life changing and significant experiences. This includes the death of my parents and my wife’s mother, the passing of five grandbabies due to pregnancy loss and the birth of six more grandchildren including two labeled by society as “special needs.”


My daughter and her husband have three children and the two children termed, “special needs” are part of their family. The lives of “special needs” families have a soft spot in my heart. Families with children who are perhaps not considered “typical,” face lifestyles that also are not typical. They are those who walk through life often misunderstood and not always welcomed by the typical world.


As grandparents my wife and I are part of the special needs world of our daughter and son in law. We have set ourselves apart, so to speak, from the typical world of grandparents. We have our times of grief and tears, yet the joy our “special needs” grandchildren hug us with is a gift beyond words. Such gifts remind us of God’s love. He sees beyond our “special needs” and loves us still.

 


The world special needs families live in is an emotional and multi-faceted one. The emotions are raw at times. This is the rawness the typical world of families is most often unaware. Day to day living for many special needs families may unexpectedly change. Plans may have to be altered as caring for a child takes precedence due to some unforeseen emergency.


As I write this blog post, my plan for my Scarred Joy blog is to include stories etc. of families and individuals who live with “special needs.” We may often think of “special needs” as primarily referring to children and other people living with such challenges as autism, cerebral palsy, Down syndrome, etc. A family having experienced the death of a child may also be considered as having special needs.


In using the term “special needs” I am cognizant it applies to people at any age or circumstance. A woman, who is now a widow or a man grieving the death of his wife, may have special needs. I also think of such things as people with acquired injuries or a terminal cancer resigning them to live with a special need.


Since becoming a grandfather a number of years ago I have taken on a greater love and view of life.  Far from being perfect and whole, life is fragile and in a sense enigmatic. As I look through my grandfather filter I see not all of life is black and white, right or wrong, good or bad. Life just is and it includes mystery!


I especially dedicate the Scarred Joy blog to grandparents who may be all too familiar with special needs. I believe grandparents have a unique bond and role to live out if they are part of family where special needs are “normal.”





10 comments:

  1. Grandchildren are certainly a blessing.

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    1. They indeed are Tracy. I hug six blessings and five in heaven.

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  2. This is my favourite post you've done, Alan. Tears. May the Lord bless many people--and may readers become more aware of the challenges of special needs families--through this new series, to make us a more compassionate and understanding society.

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    1. Thank you Sally, your endorsement means a lot to me. You understand the emotions and challenges.

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  3. This is beautiful Alan. Your book sounds most interesting and I would love a copy. Blessings dear friend.

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    1. Thank you my friend. I'm starting it out in the form of my blog posts on my Scarred Joy blog. https://scarredjoy.ca/. I would love to have you read my blog. My first "special needs" post comes out in the next week or so.

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  4. Reading this blog and others you’ve written, Alan, I conclude that you have a "special heart.” God has given you a Christ-like compassion for people who suffer grief, loss, being overwhelmed, depressed, or whatever. You are the Good Samaritan, who cannot look the other way when he sees someone fallen or injured by the roadside. You will stop to care for that person even if there is a “cost" involved. May God continue to guide and bless you as you seek that special niche of writing that touches the soul.

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  5. Hi Sharon! Your words humble me. Please know I have always consider it a deep honour when I come alongside people. There is a passage in the Bible where Jesus says something like, when we help the least of these we help Him. Wow, it is such an honour to help others. There are some things I've seen and crying sounds I have heard I wish I could clear from my mind. I accept them as part of the calling. A reason I am adjusting my focus to those with "special needs" is the lot in life my daughter faces every day with two of her children. The stress parents with "special needs" live with is immense and respite is fleeting. I just want to be a voice for them. If I was asked why I don't "look the other way" it is because I can't. Blessings and love to you my friend.

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