May 19, 2021

Words By Vickie Stam

We don't always plan to say the things we say.

Romans 7:15 in the ESV reads, "I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want but I do the very thing I hate."

What if I said, I do not say the things I want to say but I say the things I hate to say. Doesn't that sound frightening? But, if you admit it, you are probably guilty of saying something you wish you had never said.

And then there are those who have a tendency to speak without thinking more often than not. They blurt something out and their impulsive behaviour might be seen as undesirable or as just a part of who they are. 

The average person speaks about 7000 words per day. Imagine what the consequences of our words can look like. Our words can honour or shame, build up or tear down, soothe or annoy, love or hate. Each scenario offers others an insight into our nature.

Are you quiet or do you talk a lot? Are you optimistic or pessimistic? Are you kind hearted or insensitive? The words you use paint a picture of yourself for the world to see.

I'm seen by others as quiet or introverted, something I don't always find flattering and yet I guess my lack of conversation could make some people think that I have nothing to say. I just hope that I choose both the timing and my words carefully. 

On the other hand - I know someone that I will call, "B." B doesn't think before B speaks. I grew up hearing the words - "That's our B." It soon became apparent that it was part of B's character to just come out with it. 

Your words can be silent and still have power. How many words are implied with a look. When I was a child I knew what the look meant - mom's not kidding, do it again and see what happens, if your dad has to stop this car, you're going to wish he didn't" The look offered my mom a solution for a host of unspoken words. 

And yet, a smile could provide a mountain of encouragement, positivity, kindness, and love. Words have power! How someone talks to us will be remembered. How we talk to someone will also be remembered.

God tells us to choose our words wisely. Harsh words stir up anger. Your soul is nourished when you are kind. Gentle words bring life and health. 


  1. Some people talk to fill the void but I've noticed that the people who don't talk all the time have more impact when they do speak. when a person like this shares an opinion - even in a quiet voice - the rest of the room suddenly get quiet and everyone listens. If I had to choose, I'd rather be that person but unfortunately, I'm not... probably somewhere in between.

  2. I lover your last paragraph, Vickie--choosing our words wisely. Our own spiritual is nourished when we're kind, and gentle words bring life and health. Thank you for your wise words.

  3. Women see me as a friend, not a lover. It sure is true about how words can heal or hurt. Thanks for pointing out how even looks can say a lot.

  4. Thanks for this thought provoking post, Vickie. Words have far more influence than we think sometimes. Thanks for the reminder to choose them wisely.

  5. Hi Vickie! Thank you for your words. I admit I would rather not talk a lot. I do enjoy listening to people who have good or interesting things to say. God bless those who believe they have to, "just come out with it." Perhaps they are here to teach us patience of like you say, "choose our words wisely." My personal opinion is I am glad I'm introverted. :)


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