Valentine's Day came and went yesterday and if it wasn't for my romance loving spouse, I probably wouldn't have noticed. (Except for the RED HEARTS, chocolate, and all the other commercial reminders in every store.) Here is the crazy thing about it. I am actually NOT a very romantic person. My husband readily admits he is the romantic in our union and our children laugh at us because I am always the one balking at 'too much sappy-ness'. He loves all that mushy stuff.
My rule: No PDAs! Gerald's rule: Ignore Tracy and constantly embarrass her in front of others with Public Displays of Affection. I can just hear one of my kids saying, "Come on, Mom. Snuggle up with Dad on the couch and watch a romantic movie." Sigh. (My movie choice is a twisted paranormal or Sci-fi flick.)
Yet...
I write romance novels. And I read a fair number of them, too, usually for review. Okay, and I watch (and enjoy) a good romantic comedy when my husband twists my arm... probably not that much twisting involved, although I like to make a lot of noise and roll my eyes.
If I am truthful, I actually AM a romantic at heart. I've just had a lot of practice pretending not to be. I think I'm finally coming out of the closet. You see, my husband knows me better than I know myself. He knows that I actually love it when he brings me flowers or when he constantly says nice things. (I know some of you are finding it hard to believe that too many compliments can get irritating...) He ignores my rolling eyes and cries of 'Sappy!" or 'Lame!" and smiles, continuing to lavish me with such ridiculous shows of affection. AND I LOVE HIM FOR IT.
I thank God everyday that He put me with a man who loves me and doesn't mind telling me (or the world) that this is so. Despite my whining, how horrible it would be to be stuck in a marriage yearning for affection. I know this is the case for many once the honeymoon phase has passed. Perhaps this is why I find it easy to write romance novels and believe in that kind of love - the kind where the hero only has eyes for his lady; the kind that lasts for more than thirty years. (We're on our thirty-first year of marriage and thirty-fourth year together.)
God knows best. He knew I probably had self esteem issues (who doesn't?) and needed a man who would relentlessly romance me despite myself. My husband isn't perfect, but he is perfect FOR ME and I thank God for putting two unlikely people like us together.
Lest you think I am totally heartless, I will direct hubs to read this post once he gets home from work. Oh - and I've given in to the PDA thing. A waitress asked us once if we were newly weds. We just looked at each other and laughed. My husband's answer: "She's still my beautiful bride."
Tracy Krauss lives with her oh-so-romantic husband Gerald in beautiful Tumbler Ridge, BC. For more visit her website: http://tracykrauss.com
Congratulations, Tracy for finding yourself in a long, romantic marriage. Like your husband, my husband affectionately refers to me as his bride although we don't have as many years invested as of yet, but I love it when he calls me his bride.
ReplyDeleteLoved your post. Enjoy the blessings of romance.
He left me a homemade card and chocolate by my computer on Valentine's morning. I forgot to get him anything... but I brought the chocolate home from school that I got from a kid and gave it to him. (I like to re-purpose and since I'm not eating chocolate these days it seemed logical...)
ReplyDeleteA wonderful post, Tracy! Thanks for sharing about you and your other half!
ReplyDeletetongue in cheek, of course!
ReplyDeleteYour romance made me laugh--and smile. I can relate, although maybe not to the extreme as you and your hubby. My hubby was definitely more romantic when we met, but he has patiently drawn me out. Isn't that what marriage is all about? Helping each other become more of who God made us? Thanks.
ReplyDelete(p.s. I also like sci-fi and paranormal movies--I'm a bit weird that way)
Good for you, Tracy. Acceptance of loving embraces and words might be harder for some than others. I am a hugger - but have to watch reactions of others when I feel like hugging.
ReplyDeleteFunny hubby and I don't celebrate the world's days of affection but we have been married 42 years and I know God gave me the exact partner that He wanted. We love each other - period.
Blessings,
Janis
I sure enjoyed this, Tracy! It seems God in his wisdom pairs us with just who we need to help us grow. I have to admit I love it when my hubby shows PDA and he does often, and I love him for it too!
ReplyDeletePam
Oh Tracy!
ReplyDeleteI thought all women were romantics and needed to teach their husbands how to be.
I guess that puts me in the unromantic category, ripe for jibes. But it means I understand your dilemma.
I confess that now we hold hands constantly--walking, on the couch and even in bed!
I guess I'm being converted like you. But isn't it a glorious path?
I've just been going through our old greeting cards and enjoying them thoroughly. Beautiful cards from the hubby, from the kids, homemade cards from the kids, lovely ones from my sisters and good friends.
ReplyDeleteIn downsizing mode, I tried to thin them out, but that was hard. My recycling batch is much skimpier than my "to keep" batch. Rereading the cards we've exchanged as a couple, the words still ring true.
This being our 39th year of marriage, I suggested we shop for special--occasion cards for each other in the tub I've filled with zipper bags with cards sorted by occasion. Hank thought I was crazy, but I did regift him with a card from another year. You too may think this is crazy, but to me it says how thankful I am for a faithful, loving husband and for the constancy of our love.
I enjoyed reading each and every comment. Seems I'm not as weird as I thought... (and Connie, you are NOT strange for liking Sci-fi paranormal!!)
ReplyDeleteI loved reading your post Tracy! My husband is a romantic too, and I love him for it, though sometimes he's a bit over the top. It's wonderful to be loved though!
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