Pondering Priorities – Denise M. Ford

As I rounded the corner past our garage, I heard the unmistakable, “Jay, Jay.” I knew before I set foot into the backyard that a blue jay had returned to enjoy some seeds from our bird feeder. The calls became louder, growing with intensity, echoing and shouting, “Jay, Jay.”

 

I looked up towards the top of the spruce trees trying to pinpoint where the blue jay balanced at her perch. There at the highest branch the white face delineated with black and blue captured my gaze, its steely black eyes holding mine in a daring bold stare.  “Jay, Jay!” she called. I nodded and mumbled my excuses for retrieving the burlap covers from my flowers.  “I’ll get out of your way soon,” I whispered.

 

“Jay, Jay!”  She swooped by me, focusing on a landing not far from the other flower bucket awaiting my undraping. I carefully stepped away as I realized she had a partner replying to her shouts as he flitted from the crab-apple tree to the ground below the feeder.  I quickly went inside to retrieve my camera as I hoped to capture a shot of the visiting pair. We have strategically placed bird feeders directly beyond our kitchen bay windows so we can enjoy the frequent and varied menagerie that relies on the food sources we faithfully replenish.

 

Surprisingly, as I snuck into place to begin my photographic shoot, a small flock of blue jays descended one by one next to each other on the grassy patch under the feeders.

 

As if a patchwork blanket had been shaken and spread before them, the jays came together to eat companionably amidst the scattered seeds.

 

For nearly thirty minutes the picnic proceeded with blue jays alighting for refreshment and then posting themselves in the higher branches to spy any approaching predators. Back and forth they flitted, eating and scanning. Thankfully the magpies and squirrels which also depend on our backyard diner did not challenge the serenity and comradery of this band of jays.  In fact, the acrobatic squirrels who twist and gyrate themselves into all sorts of ridiculous poses as they attempt to open the bird feeders had unknowingly contributed to the feast that unfolded for this travelling jay flock.

 

As they sated themselves scrounging for every bit of seed, one by one the jays took turns grabbing new morsels from the feeder that swayed above them. I continued to maneuver myself to hopefully acquire photographs that would reveal the scene before me.  I wondered how professional nature photographers managed patience and precision with finesse and clarity.

 

All too soon the party dispersed, as a silent signal moved them to depart towards the edge of the row of spruce trees.  Except two remained, enjoying the quiet cove, eventually calling to each other as they retreated into the thickness and camouflage of the spruce trees between our and the neighbour’s yards.

 

As I reflect on the word I chose as my guiding light for this unexpected year, awareness, I gratefully accept and claim my message.

Awareness!

Become immersed in it.

Awareness!

Become intensified by it.

Awareness!

Become determined by it.

Let it open your ears to listen and to follow the messages presented to you.

Let it open your soul so you may delight in the abundance of mercy offered to you.

Awareness!

Let yourself respond within an everlasting covenant with God.

 

At that time my covenant stated that I would make writing a top priority in my life, with awareness serving as the mechanism to inspire my writing ideas. However, the CoVid virus broadened and altered the scope of my priorities. My awareness now includes the fears, anxiety, frustrations, isolation, disappointments, limits and boundaries of living safely with a deadly virus that swirls and lurks in the atmosphere. Writing priorities of any kind happen haphazardly and certainly without discipline. I had revised a purposeful strategy which I hoped would begin consistently this September. And then the question arose as I struggled to begin a writing schedule. What still matters?

 

Like a little flock of blue jays our immediate cohort during this pandemic remains as our sons’ families. That’s the group that travels with us, with whom we pause to enjoy an outdoor picnic, and who we protect from danger as we enjoy each other’s company. Our little band, our little party scrounging for the moments of meaningful time and searching for ways to branch out in our love and care for each other.

 

Yesterday, I called my dearest friend and we reiterated the priority of our prayer covenant with each other. We promised to continue to pray for wisdom and protection as we choose to boldly grandparent in-person throughout these days of an unrelenting deadly virus. We choose to support each other as we receive our calls to come to help care for our grandchildren. Every time we swoop in to be with the grandkids, we find unexpected bounty amidst simple scatterings of laughter, love and faith.

 

Are we aware of who provides, protects and places us as needed so we can lavish loving care on our grandchildren? Yes! Do I understand how this Nana role limits my writing priority? Yes!

 

The year 2020 definitely highlighted Awareness, as it prevailed during the unfolding of this pandemic. What still matters? Immersing myself in loving Nana activities and allowing the intensity of those experiences to infuse unique and meaningful writing ideas. As I respond to my little flock, I trust in the priority of love.