F is for Fortune ~ Guest Post by Elizabeth Danna

 

Peter turned and saw following them the disciple whom Jesus loved… When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, “Lord, what about this man?” Jesus said to him, “If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? Follow me!” John 21:20–22 RSV

Fortune and Men’s Eyes

Of the 154 sonnets written by William Shakespeare, my favorite is Sonnet 29, “When in disgrace with fortune and men’s eyes” (published 1609). The second section of this poem reads, “Wishing me like to one more rich in hope/Featured like him, like him with friends possessed/Desiring this man’s art and that man’s scope/With what I most enjoy contented least.” Simply put, the poet wants to be like men he knows who are better-looking or have more friends or more skills. In other words, he’s comparing himself with others, and this is leading him to be discontented. 

I know how easy it is to fall into the trap of comparing oneself with others. But it does us no good. If we compare ourselves with others when we’re doing well, we’re likely to compare ourselves with someone who isn’t doing as well as we are, and we’ll end up feeling superior; if we compare ourselves with others when we aren’t doing well, we’ll probably compare ourselves with someone who’s doing better than we are, and we’ll end up feeling even worse about ourselves than we already do. So the result of our comparison ends up depending on our mood – hardly a reliable standard! 

Comparison is the mistake that Peter made in his last conversation with the risen Jesus. When he asked what would happen to John, Jesus told Peter to focus on his own relationship with Jesus, not John’s. That kind of comparison isn’t what God wants. God made you, not someone else. He gave you a unique combination of characteristics and gifts which makes you uniquely suited to what God has called you to do. He loves you and values you as you are. His opinion of us matters more than anyone else’s. It’s a mistake to jealously want someone else’s characteristics, or to look down on ourselves because we have certain characteristics and not others. Let’s avoid I wish I were as smart as she is, or I wish I had as many friends as he does. This kind of thinking gets our focus onto ourselves instead of God. We honour our Maker when we accept ourselves and the gifts and characteristics that He’s given us. He loves us and values us as we are, so let’s not compare ourselves with others.

Elizabeth Danna, Ph.D., was born and raised near Toronto, where she still lives. She has worked for Crossroads, a large Canadian ministry, for many years. Her hobbies include music and needlework, but her main passion is the Word of God. She is trained in New Testament Studies, and has a desire to help people understand the Word so that they can grow spiritually. She recently published Through the Lens of Faith: Devotions on Life, the Universe, and Everything, from Resource Publications. She has also written two small-group Bible studies, From Gethsemane to Pentecost (2011) and The Stories of Jesus: A Study in the Parables of Jesus (2016) both from Wipf & Stock.