November 10, 2018

Embracing the Season by Sharon Espeseth


Later Fall Near Our House
It's autumn, "later autumn," I call it. The leaves have fallen and natures colours appear muted compared to the more colourful days preceding. The sunrise surprises us with a palette of pastel. A walk feels good, if you bundle up. 

I have seen many Novembers and I'm writing this on my birthday, which calls for reflection. The signs of my times tell me I also am in the "later autumn" of my life. The colourful days of raising children, teaching, managing the household and family, shopping, and travelling are vanishing. 

Hank asks me what I want.

After 43 years of marriage, the Norwegian and I don't always exchange gifts, but this birthday Hank asked, "Do you need, or want, anything?"

"No, I don't really need anything," I said, chuckling. 

"Jewellery? A new pair of earrings. . . ?" he asked.

Id love a new pair of earrings," I said, in light of this being a special birthday and Hanks offer to celebrate with me. 


What do you want me to do for you? Jesus asks Bartimaeus.


Unsplash

While Jesus and his disciples and a large crowd were leaving Jericho, Bartimaeus heard it was Jesus of Nazareth passing by. "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!" he shouted. 

When others tried to silence him, Bartimaeus cried out all the louder. 

Jesus stood still and said to his disciples, "Call him here."

"Take heart, they said. Get up he is calling you." Bartimaeus quickly threw off his cloak, jumped up and came to Jesus.

Jesus asked, "What do you want me to do for you?"

Without hesitation, he answered, "My teacher, let me see again."

 "Go." Jesus said. 'Your faith has made you well." (Bible reference: Mark 10:46-52)

Just as Hank asked me what I wanted for my birthday, Jesus asks us what we really want him to do for us. Our answer would be more serious than a pair of earrings, but my story is a reminder that Jesus wants us to consider what we are asking for. 

Learning to embrace this season of our lives





As we get older, my husband and I are facing more health problems. Hank, my senior by a few years, faced the first onslaught of the aging process. Being a couple, when life slows down for one, it slows down for both. Adjustments are needed. 

Hank and I pray about our health, especially Hank's health, but, as Hank's doctor says with a kindly smile, "I can't make you 21 again." Were both trying to reset our minds regarding what we can realistically do. I've been slower than Hank to accept our new limitations. Since we cant change what is, we need to change our expectations, and to pray for strength and guidance from there.

Last spring when I became ill with depression, again, and neuralgia, which was new, we faced obstacles in managing the basics. My doctor advised me to curtail all activities, including writing and music. Of course, I still wrote, but it was Morning Pages, for me alone. I still sang, but it was in the basement on my own. I needed to rest. Hank and I leaned on God, on each other, and on our family and friends. 

I feared something would happen to Hank. I feared being on my own after all these years. God assured me he still had "plans to prosper us and not to harm us." (Jeremiah 29:11)

Like Bartimaeus, I needed to throw off my cloak of doubt and fear and to ask Jesus to give me fresh insight as to how I must walk during this season of my life.

A message from The Message

Eugene H. Peterson in his "Introduction to Proverbs" in The Message says, Many people think that what's written in the Bible has mostly to do with getting people into heaven. . . It does have to do with that, of course. . . It is equally concerned with living on earth--living well, living in robust sanity."

Proverbs 3:5-6 in The Message says, 

                                              "Trust God from the bottom of your heart,
                                               don't try to figure out everything on your own.
                                               Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go,
                                               he's the one who will keep you on track.


With God's help and his Word to guide me, I am learning to embrace this "later autumn" season of my life. He "has not given (me) a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." (2 Timothy 1:7) 

As Eugene H. Peterson might say, I plan, with Gods help, to live well and "in robust sanity" during this season of my life. I am learning to embrace life and what is!

13 comments:

  1. Your posts are always so thought provoking a deep. I find myself contemplating some of these same things as I get older, too...

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    1. Thanks for you comment, Tracy. I just felt it was good to talk about these things--sort of my birthday present to myself and to anyone else who reads this and gets what I'm talking about.

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  2. This is a very thought provoking post as Tracy said. Life is always bringing new challenges our way and just when we think we have adjusted it changes again! I really related to the part about Jesus asking what He could do for us and telling Him honestly what we want as just this week that thought came to me that I could feel free to do that. For me it was a little revolutionary...I mean I've done it...but not with the abandon that is mentioned here and always with a lot of reservation and a quick get away in case He was angry or said no. So this was a huge confirmation :) Also 2 Timothy 1:7 is one of my favorite verses.
    My grandmother who lived until 97 (I know you aren't anywhere near that age yet!) was a very spunky lady who took such a great interest in life even though she dealt with quite a few health issues. She got very sick at age 92 and the doctor told her that she didn't have long to live. Well...she just told that doctor that she wanted a second opinion!! She told her grand-daughter that she wanted to live another five years because she still had things to do. She got her second opinion, she recovered (which the nurses said was a miracle as she was up walking in a few days) and got almost exactly another five years. She is definitely my example as I age. Hope I didn't go on too long. Just wanted to share and encourage.

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    1. Thanks, Gloria. I very much appreciate what you're saying. I'm happy to hear that you threw your cloak aside and asked God for what you really wanted. The story about your grandmother is awesome and inspiring. Blessings for that too.

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  3. Happy birthday, Sharon! And what a beautiful description of approaching God to ask Him to provide what we need (and in the autumn of our lives!)

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  4. Yes, Sandi, I believe I need to throw off the cloak of doubt and fear, sooner rather thank later, and ask the Good Shepherd to show me the way. Thanks for your comment, my friend.

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  5. I love the story of blind Bartimaeus and how Jesus asked him what he wanted him to do for him. Our pastor shared this story last week in church , and I also studied Proverbs 3:5,6 which you shared from the Message so I feel that I need to really look at these passages again, since God has been throwing them in my path lately! I loved the words, "robust sanity" that you shared, as well, Sharon. May God continue to strengthen you and Hank to push forward. Keep throwing off the cloak and running to Jesus - even if you can't see where you're going!
    Pam

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  6. I also like Eugene Peterson's phrase, "robust sanity." I feel the same way--when we keep coming across the same Bible readings, it's a good idea to pay attention. Thanks for the encouragement to keep throwing off the cloak and running to Jesus. Yes, even if I can't see where I'm going. I think that's faith.

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  7. Dear Sharon, I love how you keep turning to the Word for strength. And I love the quote you shared by Eugene Peterson. I am currently rereading a book of his titled: Run with the Horses. A pastor gave it to my husband and I over 30 years ago. Both pastors have now gone to heaven, but their written words live to encourage those of us still on Earth. I think that's the goal of most inspirational writers. Thank you for encouraging me to pursue "robust sanity" in Christ.
    Blessings and happy birthday ~ Wendy Mac

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  8. I am unfamiliar with the book, Run with Horses, by Eugene Peterson, but it sounds like a book worth tracking down. Thanks for this and thanks for the birthday wishes too.

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  9. Sharon, I've been late to read posts this month, but wanted to say what an inspiring blog you have posted. I have been in that place, where I have feared something bad was going to happen, and then it didn't ... and then something bad did happen and I felt totally unprepared for it. I think trusting God means living with the promise of Isaiah 41:13 where (also in the Message) God promises to takes hold of us by the right hand and to will help us. He may allow things to happen, but he will not abandon us. I think learning to trust God in this season of autumn, I also appreciated that concept where roots have gone deep and will survive through the winter. And living in robust sanity, what a great mindset to obtain. Thanks Sharon.

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  10. Thank you, Jocelyn, for this personal testimony to God being there for you at all times. Maybe we are more cognizant of his presence when the road gets rough. We don't know what tomorrow or even later today might bring, so it is best to trust in God at all times. I looked up the reference you mentioned in Isaiah where God says he has a firm hand on us and he says, "Don't panic. I'm right her to help you." (The Message) I appreciate your thoughts on this. Blessings.

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  11. Happy Birthday, Sharon! Thanks so much for your beautiful post about this particular season in your lives. Your trust in Him speaks so eloquently and I thank you for sharing your heart with us today.

    Brenda xox

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