Finding Rest, Silence, and Stillness by Alan Anderson

 

In reading the InScribe blog posts for this month, we are aware of the importance of rest in our lives. A key Bible passage for the theme of rest is Matthew 11:28 which states,

 

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28)

 

 

A 21^st Century Rendition of Matthew 11: 28.

“Come to me, if you have time to hang out for a second or so, all you who are looking for something else to do, and I will give you a list of errands to keep you busy.”

 

As I contemplated Matthew’s words, I had to step back and ask myself if I believed this statement. There is a time in my life when I wonder if I did. The rendition I wrote of Matt. 11:28 reflects how I used to live. How about you? Can you relate?

 

Around October 1997, I experienced a period of burnout. This was like spending life in a dark tunnel groping about as a blind man in unfamiliar territory. As a bi-vocational pastor, I worked full time as a school custodian to support my family. I devoted several hours per day to my church ministry. In addition, I studied for a Master’s degree to develop my ministry skills. After a few years of this pressure, I crashed and burned.

 

Experience with burnout resulted in my decision to change where I wanted my energy to focus. I realized in this time I lost a balance between labour, rest, and God. This period of burnout provided an opportunity to continue to serve, but in another context of ministry. First, I had to rest.

 

My period of rest included separation from pastoral ministry. I carried on with my studies and my full-time employment. Through a more contemplative approach to ministry, I looked to God for direction. Here is some of what I learned at this time in my life.

 

Rest, Silence, and Stillness

If I did not come to this place of burnout, I would have missed the blessing of rest, silence, and stillness. Rest helps our bodies to slow down and relax. This physical rest helps our mind, heart, and spirit. Through rest, we can discover the gift of silence. Silence calms us from listening to the all-consuming voices of the world. Silence leads the way to an inner ability to be still. In stillness, we can listen to God. As you may already know, this is not a simple process to follow.

 

Over the years of interacting with people, I encountered many Christians who were just plain tired. Even pastor burnout is not uncommon. We can speak of rest, yet not practice it. We may use triumphant language, yet neglect to listen to God. This is a recipe for busyness without blessing.

 

Please allow yourself to at least consider these final thoughts:

• ·       Make room for rest without allowing excuses to dictate.
• ·       When others lose their peace and turn to fear, we can rest and be calm.
• ·       Embrace silence and allow this gift to hold you as well.
• ·       In stillness, we can listen to God with assurance He listens to us.

 

 

 

 

Alan lives in Deroche, B.C. with his wife, Terry. He contributed stories to Good Grief People by Angel Hope Publishing, 2017 ; Story by Story: The Power of a Writer, Unstoppable Writers Publishing, 2018, and . Alan has also written articles for FellowScript Magazine. Blog: https://scarredjoy.ca. Alan is the Provincial Rep. Liaison and BC Rep for InScribe.

 

“Rest” For 2020 by Alan Anderson

Matthew 11: 28-29—Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

I don’t have a practice of choosing a verse or word for a particular year. I’m giving it a shot for 2020. My key word is, “rest.”

No sooner had the New Year 2020 started reality reminded me the world acts as it is accustomed. You and I are bombarded by all sorts of in your face disruption and mankind’s cruelty to each other. Tragedies like the Jan. 8 plane crash woke me up to the fact of great sadness all over the world.

I’m tired of it all. What is the answer to all this weariness, this reality of being “heavy laden?” Is there an answer? As a storyteller who is a Christian I know there is. There is only one answer and no other. The words of Christ noted at the beginning of this post offer the answer. To those who come to Him, He offers rest.

I admit the yoke of the world, its ways of life, can weigh me down. This yoke is too much and difficult to bear. These days with so much sin, confusion and disorder being tolerated, I want to fade away. My thoughts taunt me by saying I don’t feel safe and I don’t fit in. The temptation to find a place to run away can be inviting.

Matthew 11:28-29 speaks to me. The words call me back and remind me of my deep need. There is a place of safety, of rest, from the storms of life and calamities of our world. I need to remind myself of this gentle rest. I need rest found only in God. This rest is not found in the world. Coming to God is the only way. I know this is basic to our lives if we are Christians.

Years ago my family doctor suggested I relax more. I can’t say I listened and in 1997 I began two years of burnout and depression. This dark time caused me to reflect on what I did to myself to come to this time of burnout. I took on too much to please other people. I know I have considered this time in my life in another InScribe post or two. The thing is as I reflect on this even today I am still learning from it.

Years have gone by since my burnout and depression but I still need rest. This rest allows me to be calm and patient even in the midst of the agonies of the world and those I love. I’m not always successful in this. This takes self-discipline for me, as I’m prone to worry about my family and others. When my wife had cancer surgery two years ago I must say it robbed me of rest. She reminded me of her attitude rest is possible even in such circumstance.

From a personal perspective, I rest and lay aside from performing for people, in doing things I think will stand me in good stead with others. I try to be at peace with the people in my world who don’t always understand me. I try to be at peace with decisions I make regarding relationships with others, including family, friends, and strangers.

I have “come” to God through Jesus and I realize I am in the world but not of it. To embrace, and never let go of Christ’s yoke is rest. Like all Christians, I too am to be Christ-like. I am to show what “rest” looks like to the world. I can walk with Him in peace and rest.

Oh, God, help me show your rest to all I meet.

https://scarredjoy.ca/

No more. Please. No more! Bobbi Junior

     It was June, and the last few weeks of Grade One for my little girl. The year-end days were being filled with field trips, track events, hot-dog lunches, and more. 

     Andrea’s little brother and I were in the backyard, waiting for her to come home from school. Her class had held a games tournament that afternoon, and I expected to hear all about it. 

     The back gate squeaked. Luke babbled as his sister walked up the sidewalk. Calmly, she went to a basement window, and kicked her foot through it. 

     Andrea! My sweet, strong-willed but always gentle little girl kicked out a basement window!

     I think we were both in shock. She stood and looked at what she’d done, and I did the same for a few moments. This was so out of character for her, it didn’t occur to me to be angry. What in the world was going on?

     I brought her to the step and we sat down.

     “Tell me what’s going on, Sweetie.”

     Silence for a minute. And then, “Do I have to go to school, Mom?”

     “Is something wrong at school?”

    “They keep….   doing things.  Every day they DO things. Why can’t it just be school?”

     Discovering our children’s personality is an ongoing exercise for a parent. It was in this moment I identified that my little girl thrived on routine. An occasional diversion was fun, but day after day after day? The excitement had become too much of a good thing.

     “Well, do you want to stay home on the activity days, and just go for the school part?”

     “Could I?” she begged, her eyes wide and glistening. 

     “You can.”

     We stuck to our agreement, and nothing more was destroyed. 

     Twelve months later, as Grade Two wound to a close, I sat Andrea down to make a plan. 

     “Do you remember last year when you got so upset about all the activities at school?”

     “Yeah.”

    “I think that this year you should pick just two things they’ve planned, so you don’t get all worn out again. What do you think?”

     Tears filled her hazel eyes and she stuffed her thumb in her mouth.

     “Do I have to pick two?”

* * *

     This week, had there been a basement window near my foot, I might have had the same urge my child had, all those years ago. So many exciting things have been happening in my writerly life in the past year, that only by the grace of God has this introverted newbie-writer been able to survive the intensity. Good things in the writing and speaking world come with work - work being directed by those requesting your presence, your participation, your words, according to their agenda.

     It seemed things were winding to a close with an event last Monday, but then edits for a dangling project I’d almost forgotten about arrived at my inbox. When I opened it and saw the barrage of comment boxes, I crashed. 

      No more, Lord. I can’t do it. Please, can’t I just pull out? Would you mind?

     Just as I had taken my little girl and sat down with her on the steps, the Lord drew me close to him. I knew from his Spirit within me that it didn’t matter one way or the other what I did with the story. I was, I am, his little girl. His pleasure is in me, in our love for each other, not in what I accomplish. What a glorious sense of peace, to know if I never produce another word, I am still his beloved child.

     I haven’t come to terms with what I’ll do with my story that now seems to be more the editor’s story than mine. I have determined not to decide until I am well rested and can think about it without feeling stressed. Then I’ll ask the Lord what he would have me do.

     In the meantime, I will rest in the pleasure of knowing that he takes pleasure in me, just as I am. 

www.bobbijunior.com   

Inspired by Burn Out - Tracy Krauss

I'm not sure I feel qualified to speak to this month's prompt. The suggestion said, "How do you keep yourself and your writing fresh as you produce new articles, books or songs without burn-out or repeating the same ideas?"

In the past I would have said, "Burn out? What's that?" It's kind of a foreign concept for me. I've always had a fairly high output level when it comes to productivity. I like staying busy. I often have too many irons in the fire, but it's the way I like it. I thrive on a certain amount of pressure. Another thing I might have said is that I always have more than one project on the go at one time. When I get bored or stuck, I switch to a different project. 

That's what I WOULD have said... 

Truthfully, I'm feeling a bit of burn-out this year, and it's not very comfortable. The first thing I've had to do is lay the guilt aside. I had lofty goals at the beginning of 2015, but very little on my 'list' has found its way into reality.

It's not as if I haven't been writing. I submitted two articles for the upcoming Inscribe Anthology, I've continued to blog here each month, maintain my personal blog 'Expression Express', post on the Word Guild blog, and recently I started writing for the Inscribe professional blog on writing. I've written some articles for Fellowscript, collaborated on a play, edited some work for another writer, written some reviews, not to mention I've written a sermon almost every week since January. (My husband and I are serving as Interim pastors in our church and I was left to do the preaching for the entire months of January, February and much of March.) 

Just writing this list has boosted my 'satisfaction-meter'. I WAS productive, despite the fact that my two works in progress only grew by a few thousand words over the course of the last three months.  

I've come to realize that seasons of inspiration will come and go and that's okay. Sometimes the best remedy for burn-out is to just let it be. That in itself can be inspiration enough.

Tracy Krauss continues to ponder life from her home in Tumbler Ridge, BC. If you're interested in any of her many published books or plays (all published last year or earlier...) visit her website. 

From Typecast to Fresh by Bobbi Junior

"How do I keep my writing fresh" is a timely question because I haven't been feeling fresh at all. Static might be a better word, to be honest.  You see, I wrote a book called “The Reluctant Caregiver”. It won an award. It was published. It’s opened up all sorts of opportunities. And all of them are based on caregiving.

But I’m tired of caregiving! After years of caring for my daughter, a quadriplegic (now an independent adult, thank you, Lord!), followed caring for my mother who passed away after several years battling dementia, I’m finally released from the caregiver role. 

And what happens? Everyone wants me to write about it, speak about it, share about it, even sit on an Advisory committee about it.

First I burned out from caregiving!

Now I’m burning out from sharing about the burnout!

“Lord,” I pouted, “I’m tired of this. I feel like an actor who’s been typecast in one role, and no one sees me as anything else.”

I’m not sure how to explain it, but the Lord answered me, loud and clear. “I’ve spent fifteen years teaching you, supporting you, and maturing you through caregiving. Did your prayer to be used by me mean nothing?”

Gulp.

Time for metanoia. (Defn: a change in one's way of life resulting from penitence or spiritual conversion.)

With sincere apologies to the Lord, I did an about-face.

I began to look on these opportunities as a privilege. I made a conscious choice to embrace them.

Still, I need to stay fresh. I need to write on other topics so I don’t feel stagnant.

My blog provides a weekly outlet. There, I can write about any topic I want, and I do. Sometimes the rebel in me rises up and I post words that I know will rub a few folk the wrong way. Other times I don’t feel like dealing with contradictory comments, so I hold back. But those pieces get posted eventually!

The Writer's Cafe in action

Another way I stay fresh is through The Writers’ Cafe, our monthly writing group. There we challenge each other with prompts and suggestions, spend time co-writing and sometimes work on assignments between meetings—none of which, I’m happy to say, have focused on caregiving.

The Lord opened my eyes to the fact that he's put a great deal of time into growing me through this one life-experience. Once I got past my 'self', I realized it's an honour to be able to share what he’s taught me.

He’s given me free rein everywhere else, though, and that’s where my fresh ideas grow. Who knows? Maybe one day the Lord will assign me a new topic. I just hope it doesn’t take fifteen years of intense labour to become an expert in that one, too!

Bobbi Junior writes narrative non-fiction through memoir.  Topics include caregiving and mental health. Bobbi’s passion is to use story to show how the Lord brings about value for our suffering. Visit Bobbi’s blog at www.bobbijunior.com or listen to ‘Not Me, Lord” each Monday on HopeStreamRadio.com. 

Burnout by T. L. Wiens

The last few months have been a struggle for me where my writing is concerned. My focus is gone. Even more than that, I have no desire to focus. Some have told me it’s writer’s block but I call it burnout. Burnout comes with another unwanted struggle―depression.

Writing helps me avoid depression. I can throw all my turmoil onto a page and see it from a different perspective. God speaks to me through my writing. What do you do when your body is so tired, you can’t get the words to page? The vicious circle has been my companion for too long.

I think about quitting writing. It isn’t going to happen—even in my depressed, unable to write state, I know writing is a part of me. Maybe I should try another genre. The words don’t come. My frustration rises and my depression deepens. Quitting won’t work but I can’t seem to get the energy to sit at the computer.

Then, like crocuses poking up through the cold ground, ideas sprout. I manage to sit down and type a few words. I go through some old writing and do some editing. I feel a new breath of life in me. Not wanting to rush my healing body, I take a few pages at a time. It will take awhile before I get close to my old schedule. Then again, maybe the old schedule brought me to the dark place I’m just escaping.

I don’t know the answers to avoiding burnout or writer’s block. What this time away from writing has done for me is confirm I am a writer. I may not publish another book or story but I will always write. God has given me this gift and I must make sure I’m using it to His glory. Maybe that’s the part I forgot that led to the burnout.