The last few months have been a struggle for me where my writing is concerned. My focus is gone. Even more than that, I have no desire to focus. Some have told me it’s writer’s block but I call it burnout. Burnout comes with another unwanted struggle―depression.
Writing helps me avoid depression. I can throw all my turmoil onto a page and see it from a different perspective. God speaks to me through my writing. What do you do when your body is so tired, you can’t get the words to page? The vicious circle has been my companion for too long.
I think about quitting writing. It isn’t going to happen—even in my depressed, unable to write state, I know writing is a part of me. Maybe I should try another genre. The words don’t come. My frustration rises and my depression deepens. Quitting won’t work but I can’t seem to get the energy to sit at the computer.
Then, like crocuses poking up through the cold ground, ideas sprout. I manage to sit down and type a few words. I go through some old writing and do some editing. I feel a new breath of life in me. Not wanting to rush my healing body, I take a few pages at a time. It will take awhile before I get close to my old schedule. Then again, maybe the old schedule brought me to the dark place I’m just escaping.
I don’t know the answers to avoiding burnout or writer’s block. What this time away from writing has done for me is confirm I am a writer. I may not publish another book or story but I will always write. God has given me this gift and I must make sure I’m using it to His glory. Maybe that’s the part I forgot that led to the burnout.