Staying Focused by Lorrie Orr

 

I have so enjoyed all these posts this month on getting through the middle. It seems we all have much in common - projects abandoned for one reason or another. I could write about not listening to my inner critic, or creative strategies to push through, but I've chosen to focus on the ultimate reason to finish a project. 

In my late forties I began studying for a B. A. in French. My teaching credentials were way out of date after spending 21 years overseas, and I had to begin again if I wanted to teach in Canada. I started my course work (online) with enthusiasm and energy, but after a year, I quit. I decided it cost too much, and I wasn't certain that I wanted to teach. Other things called to me.

Over the next few years I stayed busy with children finishing their university degrees, leaving home, and all of them marrying. I volunteered in the church. I dedicated time to writing and had some moderate success, but hated the marketing and isolation. 

When our youngest daughter graduated and spent the summer in Scandinavia, the house felt very, very empty. I asked myself the question posed by Mary Oliver "What is it you want to do with your one wild and precious life?" The answer came quickly and definitively, in answer to prayer - teach! 

So I buckled down and finished that degree, and quickly found a job teaching French and Spanish. 

It was that final goal, the carrot of a teaching position because of the degree, that kept my focus on grammar and vocabulary during those years. 

My current project is writing a book about our years as a family in Ecuador, focusing on God's faithfulness. I probably would have never chosen to start this project, but my children have asked me to. My late mother-in-law saved every letter I wrote;  those letters, and my journals, are the basis for the book. 

Emotions run the gamut as I re-read the letters, and mentally re-live those years. There are often tears and sometimes laughter. Some things I would rather not write about. What keeps me going is the knowledge that my children and grandchildren will have my account of how God led and kept our family.

Making the goal close and personal helps me to keep going. I don't aspire to broad publication nor fame. If I did, my inner critic would whisper negative thoughts in my ear. Putting a time line on the goal helps me, too. My husband will retire in the spring and I want to have the book mostly finished by then. I'm aiming for a first draft by December 1. It's doable, and I get up in the morning excited to get to my desk. There's another project beginning to simmer in the background of my mind, but I'm keeping the end goal of the present one firmly in front of me.

Lorrie Orr writes from Vancouver Island where she enjoys boating and hiking with her husband. Gardening, sewing, reading, and spending time with her five grandchildren fill her days with happiness and contentment. She is newly retired from teaching high school Spanish.