January 25, 2015
Connecting the Dots by Vickie Stam
Proverbs 16:3 "Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."
I sometimes find it difficult to only reflect on the previous year because I find myself playing a mental game of connect the dots. When I look back, I end up looking further; following the trail back to that first dot. A person, place or thing that stands out.
A thought entered my mind while I was thinking about last year. I realized I had been out of school for more than three decades. Wow! Time had slipped away. I never felt the years gaining on me until I looked in the mirror. The lines of time were forthright; each one growing more difficult to conceal. Underneath it all I could still see the younger me; the girl who enjoyed her English class during her time in high school. I recognized that time in my life as one of those first dots. My formal introduction to writing.
Taking part in a number of writing classes over the last four years has only heightened my desire for a pen and paper. After so many years away from school I never imagined that in my forties I would choose to enroll in some general interest writing classes, but I did. There I was putting words down on paper for someone other than myself. I was so far outside the 'safety net' of my journal and I was enjoying it.
Last year, I actually began to admit, "I'm a writer." When someone asked me, "What do you do?" I didn't hesitate to tell them that my husband and I are farmers, words that flowed out of me rather easily. It's part of who I am. And then I heard myself say,
"I also like to write."
"What do you write about?"
They sounded intrigued.
I explained that at this point in time I mostly write about myself?
"Anything non-fiction, really"
Those words, "I like to write" were out there hanging in the air, hovering over me with an overwhelming sense of insecurity but in that moment I could hardly take them back. Even though I felt uncomfortable I felt something flutter in me. It was the moment of truth. Another part of who I am.
"Are you writing a book?" They asked
"No.... not yet." I replied.
"But I am writing for InScribe Christian Writers' on-line blog."
Most people I talk to have never heard of InScribe. Neither had I until I found myself searching the internet for an on-line writers group, a place to connect with other writers, people like myself who can't imagine life without words, brainstorming, writing, editing and maybe even--- publishing.
In January of 2014 I was preparing my first post for InScribe's blog. I felt nervous and excited all at the same time. I wondered what people might think or say about the stories I would contribute each month but the feedback has been nothing but kind and gentle. Encouraging.
Writing allows me to feel everything. It is my constant companion. I can't imagine my life without it. I look forward to what God has in store for me as I press on. Writing contests, delving into fiction, having short stories published and who knows.....in the future, I may even tackle writing a book.
**** In my world of dots, I trust that God holds the marker. That he has traced every line long before my feet travel its path from one to the other. I trust it is his will that I write, and I trust it is his will that someone reads it.
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You have me thinking, Vickie. People are very accepting of someone who plays an instrument, sings in a choir, does crafts, paints, plays a sport - all for personal interest and development.
ReplyDeleteSomehow, writing is different.
When you admit you like to write, and people ask you what you write, what if you were to tell them just what you said above?
"Writing allows me to feel everything. It is my constant companion. I can't imagine my life without it."
What a powerful teaching to the world about this strange hobby/calling/passion/compulsion we have to write!
I think all writers have felt this way - insecure and almost afraid to admit that we write, as if it's an invalid thing to say unless one is doing it for a living. As Bobbi pointed out, we never ridicule someone who paints or plays hockey or sings in a choir...
ReplyDeleteWriting is so personal, isn't it? And yet so vital for WHO WE ARE. My favourite line was near the end: "In my world of dots, I trust that God holds the marker." Amen to that!
Vickie,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading your post. I love how in so many of the recent posts I can see myself and relate so much! I agree with Bobbi, I love the your line,"Writing allows me to feel everything. It is my constant companion. I can't imagine my life without it." I can't imagine my life without it either. Blessings to you as you write for Him.
Thanks, Bobbi, Tracy and Loretta for your encouraging words. As fellow writers, you truly understand how 'writing' clings to us and how we hold onto it.
ReplyDeleteVickie, you write my heart, and have said it beautifully. I look forward to reading your blogs this year. Bless you as you let God lead your dots.
ReplyDeleteI really liked your closing paragraph Vickie, great imagery! Yes...God holds the marker!
ReplyDeleteI liked the connecting the dots, and also that as we trust his call for us to write, there will be the right readers to receive what we are called to write.
ReplyDeleteIt's so true that if we don't have at least one published book, we feel a little shy to tell people we are a writer, but you have so encouraged me by your dot-to-dot analogy. Yes, He sees the big picture and I can't wait to see what He sees! Happy writing in 2015, Vickie!
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