Winter of Grief by Carol Harrison

 

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven. A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.” Ecclesiastes 3:1,4

It’s been a winter season of mourning and trying to figure out a new normal since my husband, Brian, passed away. It’s been almost two years and yet sometimes it feels like yesterday.

It’s been a season filled with much weeping, especially in the first year. I’ve been exhausted. The journey with him through the cancer was long and tiring for both of us.

At the beginning and occasionally even now, it’s felt disloyal to move forward, to embrace a time of laughing again. Yet remaining stuck in grief is not the answer. At times I feel I should have moved forward further than I have.

I felt lonely and still often do and even second guess decisions I make or need to make. My partner is no longer here to discuss them with. Yet he never wanted me to stop living life to the fullest I can. It just wasn’t his desire for me once he no longer lived his pain-filled life.

So how has God provided for me as I move through grief and this time of mourning? God gave me a wonderfully supportive family who are there for me, check up on me and just care. Then He provided encouraging friends. One in particular, who lives at a distance, texts often. Sometimes the chat contains daily life activities. Often he asks how I am doing and waits for an honest answer. There are no platitudes, just genuine care and concern. I also have a great Christian counsellor who listens well as I share this journey. In all, God has given me a wonderful support system which helps offset some of the loneliness.

Yet this season of grief and dealing with details of funeral and estate along with daily life has left me feeing uncreative. All I’ve written for over two years is the monthly blog post which has taken much work and has often been difficult. I ask when will creativity flow once more? When will discouragement fade? When will the time of laughter ring out?

One day at a time. Sometimes hour by hour I’ve been walking through this winter season of life, waiting for a time to fully embrace the new normal of life, including finding my way to more writing and crafting. It will come in time – God’s timing and not mine. I pray I hear the nudge when he presents it.

 

Carol Harrison lives in Saskatoon, SK. The winter photo above was taken from the train in Northern Ontario a few years ago on one of their memory making trips. Carol is in a season of waiting for the spring of creativity to bloom.




 

Watch and Wait by Mary Folkerts

 

Is it just me, or has waiting gotten harder as the expectations of instant gratification have become the norm? 

We get annoyed when our Amazon Prime packages don’t arrive within 1-2 business days, when not long ago, we were thankful when things arrived within weeks. We love all our instant messaging, instant puddings, and instant answers, thanks to Google.

How can we practice waiting on God in this fast-paced world? I expect the only way is to slow down to a pace where we can hear his promises, trust his heart of love, and realize that his timelines are not arbitrary, even when we don’t understand them.

We are a generation 

in a “hurry epidemic.”

We rush and scurry

from the moment we reluctantly 

leave our dreams 

on our pillows.

It’s us against the hands 

of time, ticking

with the quickened

rhythm in our chest.

We’re late,

don’t be late,

it’s so late—

where did time go?

                 Running to catch up

       driving too fast,

Scrambling after time lost. 

Productivity

deadlines

target dates

                exhaustion building

      failure looming

we need a cure. 

When did we lose

the art of slow? 

Of sitting long,

breathing deep?

Of making moments

stretch, and laughter

linger?

Of watching for miracles

in expectation,

not bound by time

but fully present

to the now?

We must not be 

too busy 

to slow,

to still 

and wait

for the holy.

It is most certain

that God’s time frames

and agendas, 

appointments and 

itineraries 

are structured with a 

framework that far 

exceeds our

                imagination 

         for He is never 

slow 

His timing is perfect

(how could it not be?)

even when we think

we have waited 

too long. 

The wait must have

a Godly purpose

to refine us and

grow us. 

And so let us learn to 

                 wait—

         wait on Him 

and watch. 

And just maybe 

to be still

as He asks of us.

Because miracles 

of becoming

happen in the 

waiting. 

Mary Folkerts is mom to four kids and wife to a farmer, living on the southern prairies of Alberta, where the skies are large and the sunsets stunning. She is a Proverbs 31 ministries COMPEL Writers Training member involved in church ministries and music. Mary’s blog aims to encourage and inspire women and advocate for those with Down Syndrome, as their youngest child introduced them to this extraordinary new world. For more inspiration, check out Joy in the Small Things https://maryfolkerts.com/  or connect on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/maryfolkerts/ 

 

 

W is for Weary by Carol Harrison

 

W is for Weary

Of all the wonderful words that begin with the letter ‘w’, why choose one like weary that can be a bit discouraging? I believe, if we are honest with ourselves, we all have times of weariness. We get weary at the end of a long and busy day or when we are not feeling well. A good night’s rest helps alleviate this and helps us feel refreshed.

If you’re like me, there are times I grow weary of more revisions in my writing, one more edit, or figuring out what is the best way to market the writing or published books we have sitting on our shelves. A little help from a good editor, a fellow writer, and someone who can help with marketing strategies can help give us respite from this weariness.

Yet there are times when emotional turmoil invades our lives and it feels like there is one too many tough things thrown at us that leave us weary in spirit. A dose of hope can combat this weariness.

Charles Stanley said, “We can be tired, weary, and emotionally distraught, but after spending time with God we find that He injects into our bodies energy, power, and strength.”

Isaiah 40:29-31 says, “He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”

God tells us in Jeremiah 21:25, “For I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish.”

In Matthew 11:28-30 Jesus tells us, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

Maybe weary is the word that kept coming back to my mind no matter how I tried to find a different word beginning with w because it seems to be the season I am in at the moment. Yet as I searched for scriptures and quotes and the word, God brought to mind the promises of rest for my weary soul.

Charles Spurgeon reminds us, “In the same way the sun never grows weary of shining, nor a stream of flowing, it is God’s nature to keep His promises. Therefore go immediately to His throne and say, “Do as you promised.”

These verses and promises that God never changes and always keeps His promises encouraged me in my weariness. May they encourage you as well as we wait on God’s timing and rest in His promises.

  

Carol Harrison lives in Saskatoon, SK, and has been writing for the last fourteen plus years. Some days the blank screen mocks these days and she knows it is a season of waiting.

W is for Waiting, by Susan Barclay

 

As I was contemplating this month’s post, I remembered reading about how much time the average person spends waiting. A quick Google search took me to reference.com and some American statistics. I doubt we’re much different in Canada or anywhere else in the west. 

We spend

• 20 minutes a day for the bus or train
• 32 minutes in a waiting room before seeing the doctor
• 28 minutes in security lines when travelling
• 21 minutes for a significant other to get ready to go out
• 13 hours on hold for customer service (annually)
• 38 hours in traffic (annually)
• 37 billion hours in line (collectively and annually) – given Canada’s much smaller population, this number would be much smaller north of the 49^th parallel

In short, we wait a LOT. The Bible also contains many illustrations of this reality. Here are just a few:

• Noah waited for the floodwaters to recede and the earth to dry before he and his family could leave the safety of the Ark (12.5 months, see Genesis 8:13-14)
• Jacob waited 7 years for his beloved Rachel and worked another 7 years to fulfill his part of the marriage agreement (Genesis 29)
• The Israelites wandered 40 years in the wilderness before gaining the right to enter the Promised Land
• The Jews were taken captive in Babylon 70 years before being allowed to return to their homeland
• There are 400 years between the Old Testament and the New. Waiting and waiting for Messiah, the fulfillment of centuries of prophecy!

Even Jesus had to wait:

• 9 months from conception to birth;
• 30 years before the beginning of his earthly ministry;
• 40 days in the wilderness after being baptized by John and while being tempted by satan;
• four days before raising his friend Lazarus;
• hours of intense prayer in the garden of Gethsemane before his betrayer’s kiss;
• hours on the cross before dying;
• three days in the grave before resurrecting

Waiting is hard. It doesn’t come naturally. We want what we want when we want it. God, on the other hand, wants to develop patience in us. He wants to develop trust. He wants us to believe and know that He is God. He is sovereign and good even when it doesn’t always appear so.

As believers we wait for

• Answers to prayer
• God to move in situations and circumstances over which we have little to no control
• Unsaved family members and friends to come to Christ
• Guidance and direction from Holy Spirit

As writers we wait for

• The right words to flow onto the page
• Wisdom to know where to send our work
• Publishers to respond to our submissions and inquiries
• The right agent to advocate on behalf of us and our writing
• Words of affirmation or connection from readers

What are you waiting for today? What has waiting taught you about yourself and about God? As you look at biblical examples of waiting, what stories encourage you most, and why?

As you wait, rest in these words:

But those who wait on the Lord
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint. ~Isaiah 40:31

Waiting gives us time to develop character and Christlikeness. May we wait in a way that proves our faith and pleases the LORD. May our waiting be an offering and a gift to Him, and the results testify that He does all things well. And may those who come behind us find us faithful.

___________________________

For more about Susan Barclay and her writing, please visit www.susan-barclay.blogspot.com.