My twin sons invited me into the world of special needs in a heart-to-heart way. Before they became my sons at eighteen months of age, the words "global delay" and "developmental disability" had little meaning.
The first pediatrician who saw my boys said they would never walk, talk, or feed themselves. (Thankfully, Luke and Levi proved this prognosis was wrong by the time they were five years old.) I naively thought if I poured all my love and energy into them, they would catch up to their peers. From first thing in the morning until they went to bed at night I cared for their extensive needs. Along with hugs and kisses, I taught them many things, including how to feed themselves. (It took Luke six months of hand-over-hand feeding before he learned how to scoop his food and put it into his mouth.) I also gave them massage therapy, took them to speech therapy, learned and taught them Sign Language (they didn't talk until they were four years old), and drove them to countless medical appointments. These boys turned me into an advocate—Momma Bear! When they needed something, I researched available services and figured out how the boys could access them.
As they grew older, their differences became more noticeable. The invitations to birthday parties stopped. Their peers often spoke to the adult support workers instead of directly to the boys. In school, they were often pulled out of class and taught by educational assistants instead of their teachers. Luke and Levi did not complain. They laughed and learned and loved.
Luke is passionate about wild animals, especially wolves. He wants to be a wolf biologist. Luke can tell you almost any story from the Bible and wants everyone to follow God. Luke loves being with people. He wants to go to college, get married, and have a family.
Levi can tell you more about almost any vehicle than most guys. One time he was listening in to a conversation with a Ford salesman. When the salesman mentioned a particular vehicle, Levi said, "They don't make that vehicle anymore. They stopped producing them in 1999." The salesman argued, but when he went back to his shop he discovered Levi was correct. Levi wants to live in his own home with his cat.
Many people look at my boys and see how they are different. They are shorter than guys their age. Their voices are soft and they don't enunciate their words clearly. They struggle to express their needs and wants and get frustrated when people don't understand them. Levi doesn't talk much and people assume he doesn't understand what's going on around him...until they say something he disagrees with. Luke talks to and sometimes yells at invisible friends (perhaps making up for the lack of real friends).
According to Statistics Canada, there are over 160, 000 people across Canada who have developmental disabilities. These people struggle to access education, which results in low employment rates and a low standard of living. (The employment rate was only 27% in 2017.) For many years, people with developmental disabilities were forced to live in institutions. (Check out the historical timeline for people with disabilities.) Although the institutions have been closed and most people with developmental disabilities live in their local community, a majority spend their lives in group homes. Sometimes this is their choice, but often individuals and their families are not presented with other options.
I dream of a world where all people are valued and loved. If we all do our part, we can change our world. I invite you to get to know individuals with developmental disabilities. Find out what they are passionate about. Ask them about their dreams. Take time to listen. Celebrate their victories. If you want more information, go to https://inclusioncanada.ca/.
Is there a change you would like to see in our world? Tell me about it in the comments below!
