A Love Story by Connie Inglis

What strategies do you use to get past your fears? In answering that question I immediately thought of the main trait that makes me fearful. You see, I am a perfectionist. The scientific term is atelophobia i.e. the fear of not being good enough or imperfection. There have been times when I have been stuck in that state with my writing but I am learning that I don't have to stay there, that I have a choice.

My choice is not based on me or anything I have done. My choice is based on the knowledge that God loves me.  I recently re-read Ann Voskamp's book, One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You are. One of her comments about fear resonated with me. She said, "All fear is but the notion that God's love ends." It is true. Fear, any kind of fear, is looking at things with the wrong perspective--it's about not trusting God and God's love. So, when I fear, I find that focusing on God's love dispels the fear. There are many ways I do that.

Reading Scripture passages and meditating over Scripture is a good place to start. A verse that jumped out at me a few years ago is Song of Solomon 7:10: "I belong to my Beloved and His desire is for me." Every time I think of that verse I am reminded that I am in a love story, that I am a recipient of Jesus' love.

I have also found strength in reading certain authors. Books by Brennan Manning keep me focused on how much God loves me, all of me, weaknesses and all. The Furious Longing of God is one of my favourites. Francis Chan and John Eldredge are also two authors that speak to my heart, along with Ann Voskamp. And just recently I discovered Phil Vischer's book, Sidney & Norman. It's a children's book, I know, and yet the theme of the book is for all. In fact, I was so moved by the profound simplicity of it, that it brought me to tears. The message is: "First of all, I love you. Secondly, I love you. And thirdly, I love you. Messes and all." Yes, Jesus loves me. Wow!

Good worship music also keeps me grounded in God's love  and His ultimate sacrifice in sending His Son to die for ME! There are so many inspirational artists that I listen to regularly but one song that I find speaks to my heart every time is John Mark McMillan's song, "How He Loves." When listening to this song, the Spirit moves me to simply worship my loving God.

There is so much to write about the topic of God's love. His creation on a brisk walk reminds me of His love. The encouragement and love of others reminds me of God's love. Reading of the faithfulness of God in the past entries of my journal reminds me of God's love. Answered prayer reminds me of His love. Even His presence and strength during difficult times reminds me of His love. In fact, it's ALL meant to remind us of God's love.

I may not be perfect but God's love for me is perfect and "perfect Love casts out fear." (1 John 4:18, ESV) If I focus on that with my writing then there is no need to fear. EVER! Psalm 27:1.

The "Romanced Path" by Connie Inglis

The more I get to know each of you, the more I've come to realize that I'm not the only one with a love/hate relationship with writing. Your honesty encourages me and keeps me writing. For me, when the writing flows, it is pure joy. But then there are days, weeks and months when writing is pure struggle. In those times, it is good for me to ponder the answers to the following two questions:

1. When did you realize you were romanced by words, language and writing?

I was romanced by writing when I was nine. (See pic--I'm the one in the pink dress.) That year I started my first book. It was a science fiction that was more inspired by my enjoyment of drawing aliens than anything else. I kept my on-going manuscript a secret--hidden in a brown manila envelope inside the closet of the bedroom I shared with two of my sisters. One day I sought out that treasured envelope only to discover that my mom had cleaned out the closet and had thrown out a lot of junk, my envelope included. I sensed that nobody seemed to care but I was devastated. It took me years before I started writing again just for the pure joy of it all.

However, I was still romanced by the nuances of words and the uniqueness of languages, even the whys and hows of English grammar fascinated me. Long story short, it was this God-instilled passion that led me to study linguistics and then join Wycliffe Bible Translators. I cannot count how many languages I've had the opportunity to "taste," whether for an assignment or for survival, and I have never tired of the uniqueness of each one. I just get to keep falling in love with words and language over and over again. (The photo below shows the Shatikha language of Myanmar.)
 

Here's a poem I recently wrote about this God-instilled passion:                                 
                                                     
LOGOLEPSY--by Connie Inglis

I'm calling it a day
a year
a lifetime
with this terminal
disease.

I lie in bed--defining
dividing
conjugating                                                               Thai language. "Hello"    verbs and nouns, unable to
terminate.

"Call it a day," I whisper
I state
I explete--but
my mind refuses
treatment.

My partner linguist says enjoy                                 
savour
appreciate this
awe-full disease--
Logolepsy.

2. How does Jesus the Bridegroom romance you with His words to you?

The answer to this question brings me back to how I returned to writing. As a young mom, I started to journal but found little time to do it faithfully which was often more of a frustration than a joy. Mostly I wrote because it helped me process life.

Then there was a time when I even stopped journaling. It was when we first moved to Thailand. Our daughter, who was only ten, went through a time of intense spiritual attack. She could physically see a demon in her bedroom at night, laughing malevolently at her. No matter how much we prayed, nothing seemed to get rid of it. I won't go into more detail than that (that story is for another time) except to say that it did end. However, it was a dark time for me spiritually. I was angry at God and I questioned what He was doing.

Then, when that same daughter was in grade 12, I joined a Bible study with a group of moms that all had children in grade 12. We studied the book, Age of Opportunity, by Paul David Tripp. It was through this book and this wonderful group of ladies that Jesus wooed me back to Himself. He was gentle and tender and loving and kind to me when I was bedraggled and closed-off. I was a slow learner but He was patient. He reminded me of His relentless love for me over and over again, often through vivid word pictures. And as I learned to trust in His love, I learned to write again.

With each step I took closer to Him, I discovered other authors that took me deeper: John Eldredge, Brennan Manning, Francis Chan, Ann Voskamp. Worship music as well took on a whole new meaning. It's been an amazing and beautiful ride. I have found such a freedom in His love--freedom to write songs and poetry and stories. Even freedom to paint again (that too is another story).

One of the verses that He gave me along the way is Song of Solomon 7:10--"I am my Beloved's and His desire is for me." (ESV) The Bridegroom is so in love with His Bride that His sole desire is for her. That word picture can bring me to tears because He's talking about His love for ME!

I am so thankful that He has never given up on me--that my relationship with Him is a romance. I realize too that His relationship with the world is a romance and that it is this romance that He calls me, calls all of us, to write about.

TheThankful List - Violet Nesdoly

"Praise is awaiting You, O God, in Zion; And to You the vow shall be performed." Psalm 65:1

Do you make lists?

I do. Lists to remind me of what needs to be done, organize my thoughts, help me with shopping and packing, keep me on track when I give a talk or speech ...

Psalm 65 is David's list of praise and thankfulness to God. He praises God for:

1. Hearing and answering prayers (Psalm 65:2)
2. Providing atonement / forgiveness for sin (Psalm 65:3).
3. Choosing people to come near to Him (Psalm 65:4).
4. Being approachable (Psalm 65:4).
5. The temple (Psalm 65:4).
6. The joy and satisfaction of living in God's presence (Psalm 65:4).
7. The way God inspires confidence (implied is the need to remember ways God has come through for him in the past) (Psalm 65:5).
8. God's power illustrated in nature — the grandeur of mountains, God's ability to calm physical and people storms (Psalm 65:6-7).
9. That He is visible and available to all on earth (Psalm 65:8).
10. The reliability of day and night (Psalm 65:8).
11. God's nourishment of the earth with rain (Psalm 65:9-10)
12. An abundant harvest (Psalm 65:11-12).
13. The beauty of a pastoral scene (Psalm 65:13).

David's list is a good example of one way we can set the tone of the day by focusing on God's gifts to us. Instead of dwelling on what's wrong with life, what we dread, fear, or regret, let's focus on the good stuff.

Canadian writer Ann Voskamp began an initiative some years ago to encourage everyday gratefulness.  She challenges readers to, over time, list 1000 gifts which they jot down and share with others. These can be things as small as the comforting taste of bread and butter, to life-changing events like the safe birth of a baby.  Bloggers from around the world come together on A Holy Experience (Ann's blog) every Monday to share links to their writings of gratitude. Join in the conversation in Ann's Gratitude Community on Facebook. Though I finished my 1000 gifts project some time ago, I found listing things for which I am grateful such a powerful focus-changer I have continued the practice privately. Why don't you give it a try.

Ann's book One Thousand Gifts released in January 2011 and continues to be a best-seller.

- Violet Nesdoly (Adapted from "The power of a list" - first posted on Other Food: daily devos)

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Website: www.violetnesdoly.com

Discovering Fresh Mercy - M. Laycock

I've been doing the Joy Dare with Ann Voskamp and many others for the past month. Ann has provided a list for us to follow, spurring us to notice three things each day that make us grateful for God’s grace and mercy. Some days it’s easy. Some days not so much. But even on those days the effort is worth it. Looking for gratitude. Looking for grace and mercy. How could you go wrong?

Well, we’re all human and we all do go wrong. I discovered even this process can take me off track in a subtle way. It was day eleven. We were to find three yellow things that struck us as “fresh mercy.” I hunted around my daughter’s small house, where I’m spending my days lately as I undergo radiation treatments. The first pick was sitting on the living room couch - a yellow afghan crocheted by my mother-in-law. The second was just as clear - a yellow turban I use to keep my bald head warm. It was the third item that gave me pause, not because it was hard to find - it was in the living room too - a retro chair my daughter covered herself - but it gave me pause because I realized I was focusing on the items, rather than the mercy or the One who dispensed it.

I found three things that were obvious, things that did bless me. But did I really recognize them as “fresh mercy?” That was the point of the exercise but I realized as I photographed my last pick, that wasn’t where my mind or heart was focused. I was focused on the finding, not on seeing how and why they were gifts from God.

So I took a few moments to ponder each one again. And I found the mercy was there, as easy to find as the objects themselves. I just had to take a few extra moments to recognize it. And the Joy Dare is working. The joy was there too, bubbling up as I recognized how much my God loves me. Enough to provide things like yellow afghans, turbans and retro chairs and then to show me that they are indeed fresh mercies dispensed to one who does not deserve them.


“If I say, “my foot slips,” Your mercy, O Lord, will hold me up.” Psalm 94:18

Study your life for blessings - Violet Nesdoly

Ann Voskamp's little sister died in a tragic accident when Ann was only four. That incident darkened her life's outlook so that even after she had her own six beautiful children, she lived in the night of mistrust. She writes in her memoir One Thousand Gifts:

"The fruit's poison has infected the whole of humanity. Me. I say no to what He's given. I thirst for some roborant, some elixir to relieve the anguish of what I've believed: God isn't good. God doesn't love me.


If I'm ruthlessly honest, I may have said yes to God, yes to Christianity, but really, I have lived the no. Infected by that Eden mouthful, the retina of my soul develops macular holes of blackness. From my own beginning, my sister's death tears a hole in the canvas of the world" -  One Thousand Gifts, Kindle Location (KL) 139.

Job, whom Eliphaz addresses in Job 5, had every reason to be skittish around God too after the series of calamities that pounded him. Though not all of Elphaz's advice is worth following, his admonishment to Job to shift his focus to God's doings of "great things and unsearchable" is good (Job 5:8-9).

That's what rescued Ann. A friend's challenge to her to identify, name, and list one thousand things for which she was grateful—in other words, to start noticing God's good gifts—outfitted her with a whole new set of life lenses.

I personally have joined Ann's "Gratitude Community." We share our lists of gifts from the past seven days each Monday, at her A Holy Experience blog. The clincher for me was finally "seeing" the reference to thanksgiving in even my own life verse:

Be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and petition with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God...- Philippians 4:6,7.

Why don't you try it? Today, instead of focusing on worries and what ifs, on aches and pains, on dour predictions and dark expectations, turn the tapestry of your life around and study it for blessings. You may find, with Ann:

"The act of naming grace moments, this list of God's gifts, moves beyond the shopping list variety of prayer and into the other side. The other side of prayer, the interior of His throne room, the inner walls of His powerful love-beating heart. The list is God's list, the pulse of His love — the love that thrums on the other side of our prayers. And I see for now what it really is, this dare to write down one thousand things I love. It really is a dare to name all the ways God loves me. The true Love Dare. To move into His presence and listen to His love unending and uncontainable. This is the vault of miracles - One Thousand Gifts, KL 780 (emphasis added).

(Reposted from Other Food Daily Devos, February 19, 2011.)

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Website: www.violetnesdoly.com

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