I want you to read this; it’s important.
Did my opening sentence “hook” you?
Did you take the bait? Did I make you want to read on, to find out why I
wanted you to read, and why I thought my piece was important?
When we write to inspire, our first words or sentences must “hook” or engage the reader, inciting their curiosity and making them want to read further. If as a reader, you are like me, you know that an author has the power to invite you deeper into her work, or conversely, to send you looking for a different book, one that is more exciting.
According to the Merriam-Webster
online dictionary, when we inspire, we spur on, we “exert an animating, enlivening,
or exalting influence,” or we “influence, move, or guide by divine or supernatural
inspiration.” We encourage others, we motivate them, we offer them examples to
live by, whether our own or others’ whose stories we have heard or created.
For samples of compelling hooks, I
went to my own bookshelves, and offer these for consideration:
Meg, 1967.
A solitary little girl in a gray wool coat and red knit cap flitted through the snow, searching for a glimmer of gold. Someone had given the jingle bells to Mama for Christmas, and Mama had smiled when she hung them on the front door. So when the wind snatched the bells and spirited them away, five-year-old Meg was determined to find them and make Mama happy again.
~Sensible Shoes: a Story About the Spiritual Journey by Sharon Garlough Brown
As I read this opening paragraph, I
want to know, why is the little girl alone? Where is she? Is she safe? Why is Mama unhappy?
And because I want to know, I read on, and learn all about Meg’s sad childhood
and the lack of connection with her mother. In fact, I end up reading the
entire four-volume Sensible Shoes series, which I highly recommend to anyone.
His name was Jones. At least, that’s what I called him. Not Mr. Jones. . .just Jones. He called me ‘young man’ or ‘son.’ And I rarely heard him call anyone else by name either. It was always young man or young lady, child or son.
~The Noticer by Andy Andrews
In this example, I wonder, is the
man’s name really “Jones”? And why is he just Jones? Why does Jones
rarely call anyone by their name but by some kind of identifier instead? Who is
the narrator and how did he get to know Jones? What is it about Jones that
makes him an important subject?
As a result of reading The Noticer,
a largely allegorical work, I end up reading this four-volume series as well.
Compelling reading, for sure!
December 1950
WORCESTERSHIRE, ENGLAND
George Henry Devonshire is only eight years old and he already knows the truth. They don’t have to tell him: the heart he was born with isn’t strong enough, and they’ve done all they can.
~Once Upon a Wardrobe by Patti Callahan
Yikes! Poor George Henry! Only eight
years old, born with a heart condition, and by the sounds of it, not going to
live much longer. Do I want to read more? You bet I do!
Perhaps it’s easy, you think, to
hook a reader when you’re writing fiction. It’s true that not all non-fiction
will have a hook. Think of an algebra textbook for example. (Shudder). But we
can also write factual books with beginnings that appeal. Take a look at the
following samples.
Thirty-seven is way too young to be having a heart attack, I thought, resting my hand on my chest and struggling to catch my breath. I’m sure it’s nothing.
~Flirting with Faith: my Spiritual Journey from Atheism to a Faith-Filled Life by Joan Ball
Was Joan having a heart attack or
just panicking? What is making her struggle to catch her breath? Is it something
or nothing? What's going to happen to her?
Young children danced in the downpour like it was the first rain-fall they’d ever seen. And it was.
~The Circle Maker: Praying Circles Around Your Biggest Dreams and Greatest Fears by Mark Batterson
This downpour is the first rainfall
they’ve ever seen? Really? When was this? Where? What happened? What’s going to
happen next? How might this apply to my life?
As the son of a prominent evangelist, I’ve been privileged to meet many Christian leaders, but I never met another man who compared with Dr. Robert Pierce.
~Bob Pierce: This One Thing I Do by Franklin Graham with Jeanette Lockerbie
Dr. Pierce outshines other Christian
leaders, including perhaps the author’s own father, the illustrious Billy Graham?
How can this be? What is it about Bob that makes him so incomparable?
And finally,
The news was delivered like a blow on the chest by a heavy, fisted hand.
~thoughts of grace: inspiration and hope for troubled times by Grace Evangeline Oettinger
What news? Who delivered it? How did it affect the writer? Was
there an actual fist involved? What inspiration and hope can a book
that begins in such a fashion possibly offer the reader? Read on to find out!
Yes, hooks are powerful things.
First words must be chosen wisely and carefully as a reader can be won or lost
in the very first paragraph of a book. Take your time with these words, reread,
revise, and repeat, until you are satisfied you can do no better. Share your
opening words with your writing group, trusted friend(s), or spouse. What do they
think? Would they want to read more?
Feel free to share a favourite first sentence or paragraph in the comments – your own or someone else’s. Let’s have some fun responding to them and considering whether or not they’re good hooks.
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For more about Susan Barclay and her writing, please visit www.susan-barclay.blogspot.com.