The Truth About Personal Essays - Kathleen Gibson

We are honoured to have Kathleen Gibson guest post for us today.
 

A few times (countable on my fingers, thank God!) over my decades as primarily a personal essayist, someone who may share a memory I’ve written about has accused me of either telling half-truths, misleading truth, or an outright lie.

Delving deeper, what I hear is, “That’s not the way I remember it!” Siblings with shared memories encounter this frequently. I call it the sibling-story-squabble. As the Synoptic Gospels demonstrate, no two people—even no two disciples—tell the same story the same way.

Nevertheless, comments like that always cause me to stop and check both my motives and my memory. Sometimes (and this has happened more often than I can count on my fingers!) I need my memory adjusted regarding unimportant details—colours, numbers, comments, times, etc. Things that don’t change the thrust of the story, but may make at least one reader feel the work is more accurate. I’ve gone back and adjusted plenty of details like that over the years.

But the strongest objections to my personal essays have come not because I forgot the true colour of the carpet, or didn’t include a name, or called evening, morning, or 1993, 1994. They come primarily because, though our memories may be almost identical, our interpretations are vastly different.

"That's not the way I see it!" is usually how those discussions start. Oh, dear.

I have never changed a word where interpretation is involved. “Thank you,” I say. “Your perspective is valid. But it’s YOURS, not mine, and I need to be true to the thoughts and memories that have camped in my soul.”

Personal essay writing is vastly different from straight journalism, where the driving motivation is (or should be!) objective, unbiased and fair reporting, with opinions garnered from as many points of view as possible. Things get a little fuzzy sometimes, but though it may include quotes and references, the primary medium of the personal essay is subjectivity: the experience of the essay writer and their interpretation of that experience.

If you’re a published personal essayist, you should know (if you don’t already) that at some point, someone will object to you publishing an experience involving them, even to the point of trying to stop you. But regardless of who else they involve, the files stored in your heart and memory belong solely to you. They are yours to recall, yours to discuss, and yours to convey to others as you please. But so too, are the consequences for doing so wisely or unwisely—and that may include accusations of slander or libel.

Choose to publish sensitive essays with care and prayer, considering others’ hearts and the motives of your own. Always ask, “Would I want my worst enemy to read this?” Because sure as dandies have lions, that enemy will find it, and know how to use it against you.

Aside from making it a constant practice to study genuinely good writing, the most foundational tool of the personal essayist is truth. Staying true to one’s beliefs, memories, perspectives, and opinions reveals to your readers a developing, live, personality. In this genre, the maxim “to thine own self be true” must be followed.

That’s not ego, by the way. Publishing something that, while truthful, is unnecessarily hurtful to someone else, is. (Don’t ask me how I know that.) Change names and unimportant details, if you must. I sometimes write under a pseudonym, for those reasons.

The intentional personal essay (as opposed to the spill-your-guts social media genre of lazy writing) always serves more than a desire to “let it all out.” It has an agenda, artfully disguised, to move its readers in some way—towards new ideas, opinions, even beliefs. The effective personal essay is always ultimately not about its writer, but its reader.

The more experienced the personal essayist, the more their writing resonates with their readers’ stories. Consider authors like Erma Bombeck, E.B. White, Anne Lamott, Robert Fulghum and Phil Callaway, for starters. Their lives, revealed through the medium of honest reflection, help us see our own in new ways. We spy the truth of our stories through lens of theirs.

Some of my essays, to my surprise, have stumbled into the spotlight of a few major media outlets, some national, some international. I’ve addressed the issues of gay marriage, spousal abuse, lack of integrity in the church, fallen leaders, conservation and politics, for starters. My words have incensed some, and sent others scurrying for pen, phone, or computer to protest or agree, or simply spill out a little heart. I’ve had responses to my articles, books and blog entries from around the world. Even my newspaper faith columns, and 90 second radio spots (very short personal essays) bring some of the same results. The responses I value most are always those that come in the shape of a readers’ own personal story.

Ultimately, even when the details may be a little skewed—the tree a cedar, not a spruce—the medium of the personal essay is all about truth—your readers’ as much as your own.

So tell it already.




Find author, columnist, and broadcaster Kathleen Gibson at www.kathleengibson.ca

Out There with Blogs and Book Reviews – Ramona Heikel

This past year of writing has definitely been an experiment and an education. To ease my problems at work with tendonitis brought on by non-stop computer work all day, I started taking 2 days a week off in January of this year. Then I dug out my pen and paper and pursued two of the writing projects I’d dreamed of doing for years.

I’ve been curious about making a webpage, but put off by the belief that I had to learn HTML. And I’d been wondering if I had enough to say to consistently write posts for a blog. So I finally took the plunge and I was pleasantly surprised at how easy and inexpensive it was to create a website.

WordPress guided me through each step and their built-in formatting and graphics made me look like a pro. I haven’t succeeding in writing as many blogs as I’d intended, though, partly because I’m trying to keep my topics focused on only a few areas. But I am “out there” and that is a success for me.

For almost twenty years whenever books excite me, I’ve been writing my own personal book reviews, and most of the time it’s a novel that stirs up my emotions. I think it’s my way of preserving the experience of meeting fascinating characters, entering into their world, living through their trials and reaping their inner rewards of revelation and transformation. Sometimes an extraordinary non-fiction book may inspire me to take notes, and I’ll record some valuable insights and perspectives on the Christian faith or various other topics in a review.

I’ve wanted to share that excitement with others, especially because I don’t normally read what everyone else is reviewing. When I find a great book I want to say, “Hey, everybody, look at this gem I just dug up! It’s worth reading!” So when I started my own blog in February, I started posting my reviews of favorite books. I call them “book responses” because they are literally my reactions and aren’t necessarily in the proper format of a review. Sharing these has been a thrill for me.

Then, because I finally had a blog, I signed up to be a reviewer for two publishers and a website. Now I am actually reading hot-off-the-press books and children’s books. One of the genres I am focusing on writing at this time is children’s stories and articles, and reviewing children’s books not only helps get the word out about my favorites, but it also keeps me up to date on what is being published. I have even been sent a book by a children’s author who saw my reviews and asked me to review his new book!

Since I am attempting to write an educational “learning is fun” fiction story for middle grades, I am also reading other books of that type, and I don’t know when I’ve had so much fun. Can I just recommend one? If you are at all inclined toward science or history, pick up Benjamin Franklinstein Lives by Matthew McElligott. It’s a delight from start to finish.

Blogging and reviewing have made this writing year a successful one. My audience has expanded as well as my enjoyment!


Posted by Ramona
Happilywriting.com

Writers Unite Inspiration Extraordinaire!

by  Glynis M. Belec

I love my writer's group. When we first formed I was dreading it in a way because I was the one with the most experience, so I thought that everything would fall on my shoulders. Not so. It's been almost two years and I come away after each meeting with a smile on my face.

We are a bit of a motley crew but we all seem to love each other. Let me introduce you and you will see I love them:

Meet Rosemary. I picked to write about Rosemary first because she is my big sister and is the top of the pops in my books! Rosemary doesn't think she can write, but let me tell you she can express herself in ways that can knock your socks off! Rosemary loves to read. She doesn't read a lot of novels; non-fiction is her schtick, but she sure is an expert on...well...everything. She has her Masters in Life and she sure knows what to bring to the table. I am trying to get her to write an article called 'For the Love of Reading."

Sue is our English bosom buddy who is the sweetest Christian gal with a rebel streak. She loves to write for children and is not wont to tell us to get to the point. We can always count on Sue to keep us focused and on our toes. Her quirkly sense of humour keeps us smiling and her desire to find ways to love the little people spurs her into writing for the children's market.

Then there is our lovely Janet. Our humble Mennonite member who never went past grade 8 but has a brain equivalent of that far  surpassing University level, writes the most exquisite poetry. She has a way of penetrating the soul with her words. Her understanding of humanity is a Divine gift and her poetical paintings are the most beautiful canvasses.

Barbara has been with us a couple of times and we are hoping she is going to get her memoirs written. Barbara,  bless her soul, is in the beginning stages of Alzheimers. Sue brings her to our meetings when she is up to it. Barbara thought she burned all her journals about her post war experience. We rejoiced last meeting when she told us she thinks she found them.

Betty and Marion are new to our team but I think we are about to be impressed with the wealth of life experiences these gals plan to bring to the meetings. It's good to have a representation from so many different age groups. Betty writes a 'who's who' newspaper column and Marion is an avid reader, too.

Heather wrote a book about her beautiful twin boys and had it self published. She is an admitted SOP (seat of the pants writer) but wrote from the heart. She is thinking about having her book edited and doing a second printing. Heather has a passion for missions and a beautiful smile. She keeps copious journals from her mission trips.

Ashley is our youngest author and we are so proud of her. At 15 years of age she has just had her first novel published. How about that? Her momma and agent, Tracey, always comes to the meetings, too, and although she says she is Ashley's manager and not a writer, she is always happy to participate and asks all sorts of writerly questions. Both Ashley & Tracey share their publishing experiences and everyone learns from it.

Shayne, sweet Shayne...our song writer and faithful listener. He probably feels somewhat overpowered by all the chatty gals. Shayne took one of Janet's beautiful poems and put it to music. That was a wonderful surprise for Janet and for all of us. We love it when he comes through the door with his guitar. We know we are in for a treat.


We love our farmer Caroline. Caroline is one of our newest members but she joined us with gusto. Caroline was eager to tell us about her first article on maple syrup that she had published in a local rural magazine. This past week at our meeting, she pulled out her list of WsIP (works in progress.) Then she read us her letter to the editor. She is an inspiration to us all as she is the one who always asks 'what's for homework?'

Bev is just getting her feet wet, but seems to be enjoying that sense of belonging. We are excited to hear that Bev has a few manuscripts to bring along as soon as she can remember where she put them in her files. I can relate.

Andy and I go way back. He is a former high school teacher and we met about 25 years ago at a writer's course. He was, at the time, notorious for not doing his homework. I hadn't seen him for years but suddenly he appeared at a writer's meeting. So far he hasn't done his homework, but he keeps saying he will!



Last but not least, Amanda. My darling daughter, Amanda is the treasurer, the photographer, scrapbooker, card maker and techno-geek in our midst. Lately she's been getting her feet wet in the writing department, and recently shared a couple of her published clips. The memories flooded back, too, as she pulled out that prize winning book at the last meeting - the one she wrote in grade 5. I remember her prize was a trip to the Author! Author! conference in Guelph and momma bear got to accompany her there so many years ago. I was so proud of her (still am!)

So that's our crew; we meet monthly and the meetings carry on much longer than scheduled most times. God has blessed me mightily by nudging me into heading up this group. I am so encouraged when someone thanks me for giving them a tidbit of useful information. I certainly don't know it all but I love passing on what I do!

If anyone is considering joining or even starting up a writer's support group, I say dive in head first. You just might be surprised to discover the tidbits other like-minded souls will bring to the table!

I am loving the journey.

Trust and Press On - Janis Cox

I hate staring at a blank sheet of paper – whether for writing or painting. It is intimidating.

When I haven’t been inspired with any idea just the thought of making a mark on that paper can cause procrastination.

Today in my watercolour art class, after I had put the finishing touches on a test painting for a children’s book, I didn’t know what to do next. I felt lost.

My instructor suggested I try a four stroke painting. The idea is to only make four brush strokes on a page, with four colours. Sometimes this frees up the mind as there is no structure. So I tried it. I didn’t accomplish much of a painting but it might be of use sometime as a background for an idea.

Knowing that I had to write for Inscribe for November 3 put me in a similar position. The topic this month is writing. What could I write about writing?

Usually I write about prayer, or a devotional based on a Scripture I have read. But to write about writing – that became a blank page and I procrastinated.

Until I remembered my art teacher – who said, “just paint”. So I thought I would, “just write”.

Sometimes writing is therapy for me. Certainly when I write in my daily morning journal it clears my head – gets rid of everything on my mind – so I can concentrate on my Bible study lesson.

Other times I write because God has given me something to say. I need to put those thoughts down on paper for myself and possibly for others to be clearer in God’s Word.

And there are times when I just want to make something up – a fiction story – because I feel like it.

What I have to remember during all those times is not to stress about it. Every time I pray for inspiration – God comes through. He is the “author”, not only of my faith but of my life. I can trust in Him to help me with everything I attempt – watercolour, writing and even a new pursuit – tap dancing.

My new way of thinking is to just “do it”. Trust in Him and then press on.