The
older I get the more likely the old saying, “There’s no fool like an old fool,”
will apply to me. It’s too easy for a lifetime of learning, training, and
experience to accumulate a formidable array of answers to the problems of life.
We all develop a general idea of what life should be, a sort of matrix to lay
over every life situation, but which rarely produces satisfying answers.
Although every
life problem exhibits a stereotype of common symptoms, each one is unique. That’s
why it’s always easier to solve other people’s problems—at least in theory—than
fix our own. In fact, the older I get, it seems I have less answers to life.
While I may accrue ideal guidelines for life events, the devil, as they say, is
in the intractable details.
Ann
and I face a particular irony. As we publish a second edition of our marriage
devotional, Happy Together, some family
marriages are falling apart. All our knowledge and advice is unlikely to save
them. Here Paul’s words reveal some moderating counsel, “We know that we all
possess knowledge. Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up. The man who thinks
he knows something does not yet know as he ought to know,” 1 Corinthians 8:1–2
I’ve always
maintained that the man who thinks he knows everything just doesn’t know what
he doesn’t know; a sobering thought to an aging, arrogant mind. In fact, the
more knowledge we accumulate, the greater the amount we realize we don’t know. This
not only instils a deep humility, but our knowledge becomes increasingly
deficient. So how can we respond to life?

Paul’s
answer to our dilemma is love, on a number of levels. First, as most
counsellors agree, we need to listen, not provide answers, even if we think we
have them. In this sense a burden shared is halved, whether answers are apparent
or not. Second, as long as we are all fallen creatures, we are always one with
the other—whether their problems are of their own making or not.
Then we become
spiritual comforters to the hurting and spiritual guardians alongside the
fallen, not pharisaic advisors above them. The Bible heartily endorses the
gaining of knowledge, but abuse of knowledge generates self-righteousness and
superiority. Love provides the wisdom for its use.