Falling into Autumn/Out of the Express Line ... by Jocelyn Faire

Ruthlessly Eliminate Hurry John Piper

“Sometimes these are the slowest lines,” the white haired customer ahead of me lamented. I agreed adding that this was my second slow express line of the day; I'd been at Walmart that morning and was certain the lady ahead of me could not count, clearly she was over the limit. “If this is your second express line today, you might be a slow learner. But,” he paused, “I'm guessing we both have enough time that we shouldn't be hurried.” My response included a chuckle, “Well, looking at the others in this line, I'm guessing that overall you and I have less time left in our lives, and I don't want to be wasting it in a slow line at Safeway.” With a twinkle in my eye I added, “I also don't buy green bananas anymore.”

     When observing others, I think of aging as the autumn season of life, a kind of unhurried time. There are parts of this I love ... the slow down after a busy summer, the cooler weather, the invite to sit by a fire, the harvest time of apples, and the way autumn carries itself with an elegant mature beauty. While I want this season to feel unrushed and want ample time to be still and know that I am God, the harsh reality is that life continues in busy format, unless I do something about it. While in her early nineties my mother expressed that time still passed too quickly for her, even though she spent much of the day in her chair with few tasks on her to-do list. She spent her time remembering. 

     One of my favourite theologian poets John O Donohue said “In the autumn of your life, your experience is harvested ... Aging invites you to become aware of the sacred circle that shelters your life ... In fact if you come to see aging not as the demise of your body but as the harvest of your soul, you will learn that aging can be a time of great strength, poise and confidence." My sister-in-law believes people's character distills over time, both the best or worst have potential to grow stronger.

     I've come through quite a long season of transition ... Feb 2020 will mark the fifteenth year that two of my children went to Heaven ... to say it has been a journey would be the biggest understatement of my life. In the last decade, I have lived on two different continents in five different places, undergone divorce, ended my nursing career, began writing, met many, good-byed many, remarried, blended two families. The highway of transition has been a rich, difficult and beautiful journey with much time spent both in the desert and by the nourishing river waters. Change is constant, but self-initiated change is always more welcome than change thrust upon us. And now I find myself in a new season ... and it takes adjustment as well ... you see we never arrive at a place without some baggage from the previous season. As obvious as it is, our today, is not exactly a brand new slate. We may enter the autumn phase having undergone a wet spring, a dry summer, a late frost, a freak hail storm. And seasons do not end precisely on their designated equinox days ... chinooks do happen.

     When I ponder the question Jesus asked Bartimaeus: What do you want me to do for you (now)? I wonder what do I want? Reversal of time does not happen. Through the grief journey, I feel as though I “lost” some of my productive years ... and yet, while on the healing road, there was/is no point in hurrying. I knew I did not need to explain to God my hours spent in reflection and contemplation. While I lived my life solo, I had no one's task oriented life to measure mine against. Now that I have remarried, with a husband who works half time, I feel as if my productivity is once again measured by tasks done. This is more my perception than his. In her book Jesus Calling, Sarah Young tells us that spending time with God can be a difficult discipline because it goes against the activity addiction of this age. You may appear to be doing nothing, but actually you are participating in battles going on within spiritual realms. Last Sunday morning I passed a little girl on training wheels calling out ... Help Mommy, I'm stuck and can't move. At times I feel like I'm still spinning my training wheels, not going anywhere. It's not God's measurement I'm up against, it's my own, as perceived by others. Perhaps the man at Safeway was right, perhaps I am a slow learner.

     With God's help, I want this to be a slow down time to take in the elegant beauty of fall and share from my harvest those who need its gleanings. This week my new granddaughter and I were picking leaves in awe of the rich reds. To take a line from a gardening show ... I've matured into foliage. And isn't that a beautiful thing!

The Sense of Urgency by Jocelyn Faire

“Once the soul awakens ... you are inflamed with a special longing that will never again let you linger in the lowlands of complacency and partial fulfillment. The eternal makes you urgent.” ~ John O’Donohue, Anam Cara

Motivational forces in life can come as positive or negative. Too often guilt is used, like the sharp and annoying spur designed for horses, in an attempt to move us towards doing the right thing. We can guilt people into behaviour modification, but it does not change us at the heart level, which is where the most effective spurring happens. Spending time in God’s word and in the beauty of nature inspire my appreciation of his goodness and motivate me to share this hope with those in need of some.

Take time to delve into the riches of My residing Presence. I want you to live increasingly from your real Center, where My Love has an eternal grip on you. From Jesus Calling, Sarah Young. (Feb 20th)

How do I spur people on? By conversation and prayer. And I wish I could say I was more consistent. Often when I am in discussion with someone on an urgent matter, I suggest we pray about it. The spirit nudges me and brings to mind people to pray for: those with grief, with cancer, with marriage issues, with difficult children, those in my daughter’s Muslim neighborhood. There is a sense of critical urgency in most of the requests. It is all too easy to get busy with life activities and decrease time spent in prayer. And then I feel guilty, but what I love about God is his open invitation to spend time with him, as a friend. He invites.

What do I want to spur people on to? My husband and I just returned from a medical mission project in Guatemala. He worked on the surgical team, I helped in the hearing clinic. One young man in his late twenties had wanted to come for years, but was always working at the time. This year, he managed to get the time off to come. We tested his hearing level to discover that he had a severe hearing loss. After further testing and fittings, the audiologist provided a special higher end hearing aid for him with just a tiny wire going into his ear. (See if you can spot the wire) When the world of clear sound came to him, his grin reached from ear to hearing aid ear. I felt privileged to help give the gift of hearing to him and many others. These aids-many of them refurbished from Canada-were given at no cost to people who could not afford them. We also provided a year’s supply of batteries. My desire is to help people hear the word of God and experience the hope that God offers free of charge in their lives.

Who spurs me on? I have a dear sister and a sister friend. Twice a year we have our own mini-retreats, where we discuss needs, concerns and pray over what God is doing in our lives. These times of rich deep fellowship, spur me on to live my life in a better more loving and surrendering way. Sometimes the spur is a little sharp, and the nudging does not feel pleasant.

I have also learned much from my daughter in ministry. Many women come to her home to pour their hearts out to her because she provides a safe place to do that. Her kindness and compassion move me to imitate her selflessness. She also sends many urgent prayer requests my way.

The sense of urgency comes because it feels as though time is speeding up. Does anyone else feel this way? When my mother was in her late eighties, I asked her if she felt that time was passing more quickly and she answered yes. This surprised me because in my view she had little to occupy her time. I think she was already focused on things unseen. Yesterday marked her one-year passing. I miss her amazing positivity. She has spurred an optimistic streak in my life.

And then the rubber hits the road:) I’d done some work on this post before we left for Guatemala, knowing we returned at midnight the day before my post was due. I thought perhaps there would be some time for writing while away-who was I fooling? Mainly myself. What I hadn’t counted on was a four-hour delay in our return. It’s cold and snowy on our drive home and all the lofty spiritual thoughts that had swirled in my head under the palm trees seemed to have lost their lift. The sense of urgency takes on a more basic meaning :) And a remembered line drifts through my brain: Never doubt in the dark what God has revealed in the day.

All praise to the God and Father of our Master, Jesus the Messiah! Father of all mercy! God of all healing counsel! He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us. 2 Corinthians 1:3,4 The Message