Just Bloom by Carol Harrison

(photo by Kelsi Tooke)

Months after writing a post on my word for 2020 being bloom, I look back on this year that has been one like no other. God continually reminds me to just bloom. Circumstances without and within factor into my emotions, my daily activities, and even family time. Yet God’s Word continues unchanged. His directions remain the same as they have been since the beginning of time.

I contemplated what the word bloom meant to me, its meaning, the verses God showed me to go with the word, and how God continued to unwrap more of its meaning as I flipped the calendar from one month to another. Just as a plant takes times to grow before the maturing happens and a bloom appears, so my life and abilities take time to grow, allowing maturity or a movement closer to it at least. The bloom is the completion of a cycle for the plant – a finishing of what had begun as the seed sprouted.

The longer I spent searching for the meaning to this word, bloom, in my life this year, I felt God encourage me to complete some projects which had been left unfinished for too long. Life held many uncertainties in January as my husband faced serious health issues. I needed to stick close to home, long before COVID restrictions forced it to become a daily reality in most of our lives. Limitations outside the home gave me opportunities to revisit long shelved writing projects and bring them to a stage of fruition. They needed to see the light of day, develop into something stronger, and finally be shared with others when the time was right.

No more excuses. No more procrastination or comparing myself to other writers I admired, and finding myself wanting. 

After all, one flower doesn’t quit blooming because it looks different than the plant next to it. With a renewed sense of purpose and peace at blooming where God planted me, I pulled out a book of short stories I was co-authoring and the two of us revised, put them in an order, had them edited, and sent them to be printed. Making Crooked Places Straight had been a work in progress for almost three years. But the time was just right for this book full of stories of hope and God’s fingerprints in people’s lives arrived during a time of fear and hopelessness for many people.

I pulled out a project to edit for a lady with learning disabilities who needed help with her story. My procrastination on this is something that filled me with regret. Yet the magnitude of help required seemed such a daunting task. God prodded and nudged me to grab hold and trust Him. Her excitement at receiving printed copies of her story brought tears to my eyes, chastised me for waiting so long to begin the revisions, and also allowed me to thank God for helping me bloom a little more.

Then I grabbed a huge project off the shelf. I quit procrastinating on my first novel, A Home for Susannah, and asked God to take away my fear, my urge to compare myself to others, and to enable me to work on it, if the time truly was right. Hours passed as I revised, took the suggestions of a couple of Beta readers, and finally sent it off to the editor. Back and forth we went. Changes complete, the book became available in September.

I am a work in progress. The nasty invaders of comparison and feelings of inadequacy still try and choke the bloom right out of me. Relying on God’s grace and all sufficient help to clear those cobwebs and thistles is needed every hour of the day. There are many moments of teaching, refreshing my memory, and reminders to trust God and not waste time worrying about what He is asking of others.

The brave little sunflower in the picture, waving in the winds of changing weather, shorter than most, has lots of room to grow but the bloom adds colour to the gritty side of a highway. It waits for its seeds to be filled, never complaining of the harshness of its environment, or how different it looks. It just blooms.

2020 has been a year of change as the unexpected took hold. It has been a year of finishing projects and jotting down more ideas waiting to be filled out and released into the world. It has been a year of personal growth, of being willing to let go of the things that hold me back. God has been working on helping me realize the value of being who He wants me to be instead of a copy of anyone else.

Flowers need the rain and the sun, the dark days and the bright ones too. Everything has a purpose. There are times this year, I have been tempted to give in to the tough situations, throw the covers over my head, and quit trying to bloom. Then God sends reassurance, affirmations, friendships, and those who encourage and support. I dive into His Word to find those promises of how unchangeable God is and how He will supply all our needs. I look at the flowers that bloomed in the summer, enjoy their bright spots in an uncertain world, and ask God to help me continue to bloom where I am.

Just bloom – that beautiful process of becoming all God wants me to be. Don’t give up when difficulties engulf but remember the truth of Philippians 1: 6, “Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Then I can know the truth of Paul’s words in Philippians 3: 12-14 “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But the one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

 

 Carol Harrison lives, writes, and sometimes even wants to quit from her home in Saskatoon. Yet she wants to allow God to help her bloom right where she lives. She appreciates those who offer their words of affirmation and challenge her as she shares stories to help others find a glimmer of hope and a glimpse of joy.

Bloom Where You Are Planted by Lynn Dove

The sidewalks were pink with cherry blossom snow.  I could smell the fragrance of newly mowed grass, mingled with the sweet aroma of springtime blossoms.  The seagulls screeched their welcome to me as I walked towards the shoreline and embraced the full view of the ocean, the waves lapping in rhythmic cadence to the beating of my heart.  I was home.  Well, the home of my childhood at least. 

Several weeks before the travel bans and the Covid_19 season of isolation hit us all, I had left my wintry “home” in Alberta, to come to Vancouver Island for a week-long stay.  Had I known what we would be facing when we returned home from the Island, I likely would have fretted and not enjoyed this brief sojourn.  Thankfully, we were blissfully unaware of the growing pandemic looming just over the horizon so we thoroughly enjoyed our trip, drinking in the beauty and familiarity all around us.  Truth be told, I have been a prairie girl far longer than an island girl, having lived in the Calgary area most of my adult life.  Still, whenever I have had opportunity to visit Victoria and travel up and down the Island, I always feel like I am experiencing a homecoming of sorts.  The Island is where I spent my childhood, my teen years, and two years of university before I married the love of my life and returned to Calgary to settle permanently.  I have been a landlubber in Alberta since 1979, raising my family, and enduring the long, harsh winters there.  The getaway to visit parents, friends and family on Vancouver Island has become an almost yearly trek.  It is our annual reprieve from the cold of February and March in Alberta, to embrace Spring in all its glory there on the Island.  I drink in all the green, the budding trees, the crocuses and daffodils that grow like weeds everywhere I look.  I want the sights and smells to imprint themselves on my psyche, so I can recall them vividly when I again return to my Albertan home still in the throes of winter.

Last year, we did not go to the Island.  In April last year I was experiencing a myriad of strange aches and pains that was eventually diagnosed as endometrial cancer.  Spring was all but forgotten as I fought and battled up to Christmas.  During the darkest of those days, when the battle seemed almost overwhelming, I wasn’t sure I would ever experience another spring.  I felt the icy fingers of winter engulf me, even in the heat of summer.  I tried to remain positive, leaning on God for strength through the ordeal of chemo.  Always looking towards the finish line, when I could declare the battle over, I found comfort thinking about how I would embrace life after cancer.  The first item on my “to do” list, was to plan a trip to the Island. 

Wonderment.

 It’s the best way to describe how I felt throughout that week on Vancouver Island.  Wonderment at experiencing Spring in all its glory there, but also wonderment at being fully alive, fully in the moment, battle-weary, but overwhelmingly thankful to be thriving, not just surviving once again!
 

That feeling persists. 

Coming home to wintry Alberta, I didn’t complain about leaving the green of Spring there on the Island even when I saw the white drifts of snow piled up in our driveway.  I was home.  The break from winter had been refreshing, but the familiarity and peacefulness I feel here, even being in the last grips of winter chill, warms my heart like nothing else.  I remind myself that I must bloom where I am planted.  I must bloom, survive, thrive, and embrace life for as many days, weeks, and years that God gives me.  

I can't forget that.

Even in the midst of this Covid isolation, forced quarantine, and my inability to venture out because of my compromised immunity, I remind myself that this season will pass eventually.  I long to hug on my loved ones, and my arms ache to cuddle my grandbabies once again.  Still, I continue to stay positive.  I must enjoy each day as a gift from God no matter what circumstances lay before me.  I must continue to bloom, to look to the future, and be thankful.

After all, I praise God every day that I can bloom at all!

Lynn Dove is the award-winning author, of the YA “Wounded Trilogy”- a contemporary Christian fiction series with coming-of-age themes.  A wife, mom, grandmother, and free-lance writer with articles published in several magazines and anthologies including Chicken Soup for the Soul books, her blog, “Journey Thoughts” is a Canadian Christian Writing Award winner.  Readers may connect with her on Facebook, Twitter, and at lynndove.com   

Bloom in 2020 by Carol Harrison

A number of years ago we began attending a small church in the city. At the New Year's Eve service, the pastor challenged each of us to write a letter to ourselves and include where we saw God directing us for the upcoming year. We could take time to reflect on the year coming to a close but focus on what lay ahead. He suggested we look at where we wanted to grow and change in all aspects of our lives, with God's help, or what we were asking God for in the upcoming year.  We sealed our completed letter in the envelope provided and handed it to the pastor on our way out of the sanctuary. He would store them for safekeeping until the next New Year's Eve when we could read it and reflect on how God had worked in our lives over the course of a year.

Even though project has not happened for years, it gave me a new perspective of reflection at the end of one year and prayerfully considering what to ask God for in the upcoming one. I no longer write a letter to myself, but I do journal my thoughts, reflections, requests, and hopes as each new year arrives. Last year, for the first time,  God gave me a specific word for the year, 'faithful', and a verse Isaiah 41:10 "So do not fear. I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Later the word courage became part of my focus with God too.

This year my reflections on 2019 included many challenging moments with health concerns for myself and my husband. Life contained more unknowns than usual, yet God had been faithful throughout. When fear gripped me, I clung to his promises for help and strength. I longed to start fresh as we began this new year. Yet 2020 began in the same way the old year ended - with continued serious health issues for my husband which limited what he could do or that we could do together. I found myself questioning what I should set as goals with these ongoing challenges. Should I even plan to complete any projects, take on speaking engagements or just stick close to home? What word could God possibly have for me this year?  I thought courage might be appropriate but I longed to hear God's still small voice speaking His word for this year.

I thought about it. I prayed about it. I contemplated ignoring the possibility of a particular word and just go on trying to limp through the days, weeks, and months ahead, hoping to remain a faithful steward of the gifts God gave me.

One day, when silence seemed the answer to my prayers, I looked at a social media post from Dayspring. I read through some of the reflection questions and plugged in my answers. At the end of the questions I hit enter and a word for the year appeared. I chuckled a bit to myself when I read 'bloom' and then dismissed it as an interesting way to pass a bit of time but not really valid.

Yet God kept bringing this word back to mind along with a picture I had taken on a road trip in  September 2019. All day my oldest daughter and I had traveled in rain, mist, and fog. Now brooding skies held a promise of more rain or storms. We opted for a stretch break and stood on the ditch side of the car. We snapped photos of the beauty of the cloud layers and fields shrouded in gloom. Then I looked down. At the edge of the shoulder, growing from the gravel, stood a stunted sunflower plant. It's bright yellow head waved in the wind granting a ray of colour in a drab day. It caused me to ask questions that no one could answer. How did one sunflower grow here? How did it produce such a large head in such tough

growing conditions?

I pondered the significance of this word bloom and questioned whether God had used an interesting method to help me hear what he had been trying to tell me. I thought more about the brave sunflower growing in harsh conditions and how we stopped in just the right spot, our attention captured by the clouds but surprised with what was right at our feet.

I searched for some quotes or thoughts on the word bloom, other than the obvious flower in bloom usage. Several anonymous quotes caught my attention. One, written like a definition, said, "Bloom:a beautiful process of becoming."

Synonyms for bloom include open, burgeon and mature. In Philippians 3:12-14 I read, "12 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13.. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14. I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

I am not perfect. I have not attained all that God has in store for me and yet he wants me to bloom, to mature, and to grow in Him.

Then I found another quote with no author given. "A flower does not think of competing with the flower next to it. It just blooms." Oh this one pricked deep, for too often I compare myself to others and find myself wanting. I have done this so often throughout my life and God has been working at weeding those negative thoughts out and asking me to depend on him.

One last quote I read, again with no author listed, said this, "Flowers do not bloom without a little rain. Everything has its purpose, even pain."

God uses everything to help me grow, mature and bloom but how often do I fight against the pain, the tough stuff, and the uncertainty? The verse I had for last year still resonates deeply this year and talks about not fearing or being dismayed even in the pain and difficulties. This year the verse God gave me to go with the word bloom is Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, : plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

I don't know what his plans are. The days are filled with uncertainty and change but I believe with all my heart I can trust God.

So as I head into 2020 I will continue to trust God to help me bloom no matter what the circumstances just like that little sunflower grew, bloomed and flourished in less than ideal growing conditions. I will cling to the promises in God's word that he has a plan, that he will hold me in his righteous right hand and asks me simply to be faithful. I also plan to remember Philippians 1: 6 "being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. "

I want to Bloom in 2020 whatever that may look like. 

 Carol Harrison is a storyteller who lives in Saskatoon, SK with her husband Brian and youngest daughter, Amee. She has two published books as well as stories in a number of anthologies and articles in several magazines.