It all began many years ago when I discovered Lucy Maud Montgomery's published journals in the 1980s. I felt I'd unearthed a treasure. By then, I was a devoted fan of her novels and poetry, and I gobbled up anything I could find about her life and work. She was my inspiration for finding the beauty in life and writing about it. I took notes. And paid attention to what made her journals interesting for me to read. She shared so many aspects of her life - growing up in her grandmother's home, her involvement in her community on Prince Edward Island, her friendships and amusements, what she read, what she wrote, the joy she took in the seasons, sunsets and flowers, not to mention kitty cats. She shared her woes and mental sufferings... along with her many joys and pleasures.
I eventually learned that it was best for my brain and personality to keep everything in a single journal rather than keeping various topical notebooks. Keeping more than one meant I was forever looking for the one I wanted. It didn't help me be organized; it just made me irritated. My journals are a motley collection in size, pattern, and style. I eventually decided against coil-bound notebooks—how would I label the spine with volume numbers and range of dates? My most recent favourite style of notebook is one put out by Nota (I find it at Indigo). It has an open spine exposing the decorative 'Coptic-stitch binding', which I really like, the spine of books usually being hidden by the cover. The pages easily lay open while I'm writing, and when it's full, its spine makes for easy labeling.
Three Journal Side Trips
As I already mentioned earlier, a single journal with many volumes has companioned me over the years. But there have been short seasons when I did keep a separate notebook for a specific purpose. My Gratitude Journals in half size notebooks, for one. Sarah Ban Breathnach's book Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy (her January 14th entry) was my inspirational first intro to such a lovely exercise. It helped me to establish the lifelong habit of living a life in gratitude. I think there are three such notebooks on my bookshelf; every once in a while I revisit those old lists from another life time.
And then there was the season when I discovered Julia Cameron's ritual of Morning Pages. It took some years to recognize that this could be something to use when I needed to blow off steam, vent hidden frustrations, anger, and pent-up pain (all part of pouring it out to the Lord in three pages). I have never wanted my ‘insane’ ravings and laments to be a permanent part of my journals. For I never wanted to revisit those traumatized moments, not did I ever want someone to stumble upon them. So, I used up old scribblers and notebooks as temporary depositories where I wrote it all out…down to the last tiny ‘huff and puff’ of the abating squall. I don't reread them—the scribblings are destroyed, either at that point or when a notebook is full. And should there come out of those ramblings a few lines worth keeping, those are transferred into my regular journal. Morning Pages has been such a helpful tool for releasing brewing emotion and pain. In writing it all out in this safe place, I'd feel a lightness in the emptying process. I felt heard. I felt release. I slept better. Most importantly, I felt peace in my heart.
Brenda writes from her perch by the study window that overlooks her garden and the birds. You can find her writing on her blog It's A Beautiful Life. She's also on Facebook and Instagram (under Bren Leyland).


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