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Today we are delighted to welcome long time InScribe member, Shirley Williams, as our Guest Blogger.
Write a Story where it’s difficult to give thanks in your writing. What did God teach you through this experience?
Sometimes it’s hard to give thanks in our writing, when life is challenging. Here’s my story of this example.
It’s funny how life goes. I don’t know how we can ever expect anything to stay the same in life, because it really doesn’t. I guess we need to learn this lesson as time goes on. We know it with head knowledge, but sometimes until it hits our hearts, it doesn’t become reality.
Within the last two years I have lost four dear friends. One moved away (difficult to connect) and the others passed away in their early 60s. One was a lifelong farm friend (60 years), two were church friends (25 years), and the last one was a work friend (15 years).
The three friends that passed were very unexpected and emotional. My lifelong friend, Judy’s passing was especially tragic because her health came crashing down, while we were preparing for our daughter’s wedding. We could only do so much for her at the time, but thankfully after the wedding I was able to see her the day before she passed. Her health was not the only tragedy in her life, but so was her last 20+ years. Her husband left her destitute with two special needs children, stole her farm, committed adultery and barely/rarely supported them. Her sister and friends supported somewhat, but sadly she never recovered from her loss.
Judy and I were two years apart and grew up nearby, on our Alberta family farms. Our families were good friends. As we grew up, we played, worked, travelled, camped, and enjoyed many movies, events and especially good visits together. We ended up in the same town, and both had children on the autism spectrum. Thankfully, we were able to understand/support one another. We also shared the same family dynamics and similarities/interests. We were referred to as “twins”! We chatted, laughed, cried, and prayed together, and our visits were never long enough. Kindred Spirits, how precious our friendship was!
I wrote a yearly Christmas letter and last year expressed that some of my dear friends had passed away. I was hoping that some friends would have realized my need for extra companionship that year. Sadly, it didn’t really happen.
During that season, the odd friend reached out, and we connected a couple times and a couple others attempted too, but illness, overwhelming responsibilities, and conflicting schedules led to nothing. I was thankful for those who reached out, but sad that connections were so poor in my sad year of mourning.
This was shocking, as I feel that I’ve reached out to many friends over the years during good and hard times and I kind of felt a bit cheated. I also realized that I hadn’t reached out fully with authenticity about my extra need for friendship. (I thought my friends would have caught on, but they didn’t.) At the time, I wasn’t sure what was going on? Was this just part of our senior years, or maybe the sign of our complicated times of poor communication. I just waited to see if someone would contact me, so I waited (usually I’m the contact person). I waited and waited and prayed and waited. Nothing. Finally, after months of waiting and suffering, with God's help I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself, rethink things and choose thankfulness/forgiveness (others/myself) and moved on. I joined a Bible study and started reconnecting, and it was good. We continue God's ministries for us (ironically connecting others). Loving and serving (even if not returned) and receiving from others with authenticity (good attitudes/boundaries).
It was hard, until recently, to write about this painful experience with thankfulness during this time of mourning, disappointment, and transition. Thankfully God heals, fills all the voids and helps us process our losses, unmet expectations, and struggles. He guides us with His perspective/will as He “works everything out for good…” (Romans 8:28) and transforms us into His likeness, to do things His way and not ours.
Thank God for getting me through a very sad/trying year. With His help, I choose not to have any more friendless seasons and will always find something to be thankful for, in my experiences for spiritual growth and expressed through my writing. When we ask/obey/trust/wait on Him, He’s always faithful and our true best friend, who never fails. Praise the Lord, through whom ALL blessings flow!
Shirley Williams lives with her husband in Barrhead, Alberta. She loves writing for healing and to encourage others. Some of her projects include co-authoring with her son Joseph (ASD spectrum). You can reach her at: lifebuild12@hotmail.com
It’s funny how life goes. I don’t know how we can ever expect anything to stay the same in life, because it really doesn’t. I guess we need to learn this lesson as time goes on. We know it with head knowledge, but sometimes until it hits our hearts, it doesn’t become reality.
Within the last two years I have lost four dear friends. One moved away (difficult to connect) and the others passed away in their early 60s. One was a lifelong farm friend (60 years), two were church friends (25 years), and the last one was a work friend (15 years).
The three friends that passed were very unexpected and emotional. My lifelong friend, Judy’s passing was especially tragic because her health came crashing down, while we were preparing for our daughter’s wedding. We could only do so much for her at the time, but thankfully after the wedding I was able to see her the day before she passed. Her health was not the only tragedy in her life, but so was her last 20+ years. Her husband left her destitute with two special needs children, stole her farm, committed adultery and barely/rarely supported them. Her sister and friends supported somewhat, but sadly she never recovered from her loss.
Judy and I were two years apart and grew up nearby, on our Alberta family farms. Our families were good friends. As we grew up, we played, worked, travelled, camped, and enjoyed many movies, events and especially good visits together. We ended up in the same town, and both had children on the autism spectrum. Thankfully, we were able to understand/support one another. We also shared the same family dynamics and similarities/interests. We were referred to as “twins”! We chatted, laughed, cried, and prayed together, and our visits were never long enough. Kindred Spirits, how precious our friendship was!
I wrote a yearly Christmas letter and last year expressed that some of my dear friends had passed away. I was hoping that some friends would have realized my need for extra companionship that year. Sadly, it didn’t really happen.
During that season, the odd friend reached out, and we connected a couple times and a couple others attempted too, but illness, overwhelming responsibilities, and conflicting schedules led to nothing. I was thankful for those who reached out, but sad that connections were so poor in my sad year of mourning.
This was shocking, as I feel that I’ve reached out to many friends over the years during good and hard times and I kind of felt a bit cheated. I also realized that I hadn’t reached out fully with authenticity about my extra need for friendship. (I thought my friends would have caught on, but they didn’t.) At the time, I wasn’t sure what was going on? Was this just part of our senior years, or maybe the sign of our complicated times of poor communication. I just waited to see if someone would contact me, so I waited (usually I’m the contact person). I waited and waited and prayed and waited. Nothing. Finally, after months of waiting and suffering, with God's help I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself, rethink things and choose thankfulness/forgiveness (others/myself) and moved on. I joined a Bible study and started reconnecting, and it was good. We continue God's ministries for us (ironically connecting others). Loving and serving (even if not returned) and receiving from others with authenticity (good attitudes/boundaries).
It was hard, until recently, to write about this painful experience with thankfulness during this time of mourning, disappointment, and transition. Thankfully God heals, fills all the voids and helps us process our losses, unmet expectations, and struggles. He guides us with His perspective/will as He “works everything out for good…” (Romans 8:28) and transforms us into His likeness, to do things His way and not ours.
Thank God for getting me through a very sad/trying year. With His help, I choose not to have any more friendless seasons and will always find something to be thankful for, in my experiences for spiritual growth and expressed through my writing. When we ask/obey/trust/wait on Him, He’s always faithful and our true best friend, who never fails. Praise the Lord, through whom ALL blessings flow!
Shirley Williams lives with her husband in Barrhead, Alberta. She loves writing for healing and to encourage others. Some of her projects include co-authoring with her son Joseph (ASD spectrum). You can reach her at: lifebuild12@hotmail.com
Thank you, Shirley, for writing your story of God's faithfulness in helping you through a most difficult time of grief and loneliness. Your words, "thankfully God heals, fills all the voids and helps us process our losses, unmet expectations, and struggles. He guides us with His perspective/will..." can alter our own perspective to be thankful in all things.
ReplyDeleteThat was not an easy share. But thankful for the reality of the Lord’s faithfulness.
ReplyDeleteDear Shirley, Thank you for sharing your blog with us. Recently I realized I needed to reach out to a friend whom I hadn't been in touch with for far too long. Your words have strengthened my resolve to be a more loving and caring person for her. I also thank God for helping you through "a very sad/trying year". Blessings on you, Shirley.
ReplyDelete