Anyone who has spoken to me recently, or read the New Year post on my blog would think that I’m the kind of person who flies by the seat of my pants. Who hates goals and making lists.
Anyone who has known me for years knows plainly and without a doubt, that I am a die-hard list-maker, scheduler, and goal-setter. I have even gone so far as to make a colour-coordinated schedule of every single household chore done over a whole year, right down to daily sweeping of the floor.
I like to label things and make charts and check things off.
That’s why it’s a big stretch for me to lay all of that aside. Not to even go there.
It’s kind of like Tracy’s “Making a List and Leaving It” – only without the list.
No pretty checkmarks in colour-coordinated columns.
But that is what God is asking me to do this year.
He is asking me to give up all the charts and lists, and be quiet.
He knows me so well; knows that if I had lists and goals to accomplish, that would be my focus - the busyness of getting it all done.
I am to be quiet in my spirit – to keep listening to His voice.
And I am to be quiet in my outer life – to give up the busyness.
Then, in my quietness, I need to show up.
Show up at my writing desk regularly to write what He wants me to write.
Show up in the opportunities He places in my path to Love God and Love People.
Luke 10:27 – “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbour as yourself” is my verse for this year.
Over the years the Lord and I have had some great conversations in front of my bathroom mirror as I get ready for the day. The conversations have been about big things, little things, and everything in between.
It’s where I got angry with Him for not answering our plea for help in deciding what church to attend when our girls were little, and He answered so plainly and faithfully.
It’s where one day He said, “Maybe don’t wear any make-up today.”
“WHAT?? Not even mascara??”
That was a lesson in His love for me just the way He made me.
Last week I was feeling uncomfortable with no charts full of lists and goals to do. So I said, “Maybe I could just try to enter one writing contest a month …”
Immediately the words Don’t Fence Me In flashed upon my mind.
So it was confirmed.
Feels a little like walking on one of those swinging rope bridges hanging over a gorge. Anything could happen. I could lose my footing. A big wind could come up and swing that bridge so hard I’d barely be able to hang on. Or, it might be a nice scenic bouncy walk.
So, I won't fence Him in. It makes me nervous. It feels risky and dangerous. But it’s safely dangerous because I have learned to trust the One who is asking it of me.