December 22, 2015
My Little Children by Alan Anderson
"...whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away" (James 4:14 NKJV).
Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdon of heaven belongs to such as these" (Matthew 19:14).
As I write this post it is a cold and dark evening outside. My wife and I are sitting together watching a new Christmas movie on TV. Well, I guess I should say I'm semi-watching the movie! I'm doing some writing at the same time. Our young poodle Charlie, is being a brat and teasing us in his own mischievous way. He is a nice companion!
At this time of year my mind bounces from the joy of the birth of Jesus to the cries of parents who grieve the absence of little ones they looked forward to. Many of us may be aware Christmas brings a sense of someone missing in a deep way for some people. I'm one of them!
There are particularly poignant memories that habitually visit my mind and heart. They are a continual prompt for the tone of my writing. These memories will never fail to be reminders of the frailty and vulnerability of life. Life indeed, is but a vapor!
My wife and I love our six grandchildren. Their giggles and laughter help strengthen the beats of our hearts. Their personalities are vastly different from child to child. Each one is unique. Each one is loved beyond measure! Lord willing, we will see them all during Christmas when we gather as a family.
We are also grandparents to four grandchildren in heaven! Our little ones who were never born! Our family looked forward to the births of these children. Their parents especially anticipated a growing family. Like a vapor their lives vanished away! Hearts were broken. Life changed!
I haven't read of too many articles or books etc. written from the persepctive of grandparents regarding pregnancy "loss". Perhaps I can help change that! We feel the deep pain of our children as they grieve. We also live with the pain of our loss. Even at times like Christmas when grandkids do fun things as sit on Santa's lap, grandparennts can feel such loss.
Dads often feel they have to "fix" things for their children. I cannot fix this! I cannot take away the sorrow my children experienced when they found out their babies would not be born. I can, however, love them!
As a grandfather I cling to the anticipated memories I had of these children being part of my life. They would have called my wife and I, Mie Mie and Papa, just like our other grandchildren! I must admit I wept each time when I heard the news they would not be! They were not mere embryos or blobs of flesh. They were my grandchildren. They still are!
In my memories these children have not vanished away. They live in my heart. They live also where Jesus lives! Saying such things may sound fat fetched to some readers. Perhaps some are surprised a man would express such a belief and emotion.
Children who are not granted physical birth do not cease to exist. They are not "miscarriages"! They are not really lost! This is a belief of hope found in the One who came to earth and was born as a baby. The One who loves children!
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